Confessions of a Confused Mind

“Hang in there”…”keep trying”…”shit happens”…”whatever happens, happens for good”…Have you heard these before or have they fallen on your wax-filled ears before? If you have been hearing this for sometime now, it means, you are pretty much screwed. Unless you take it by the scruff of the neck or get real lucky, its gonna reamain pretty much the same.

I am not trying to be cynical here. Nor am I saying that all the people are phonies. I might be just speaking out of confusion and frustration. I feel saturated. I am beginning to lose patience. But they say patience is virtue. Am I in a David Lynch movie? Am I listening to Crackity Jones?

To get what you want, all you need is a strong will and a “burning” desire. Well, at least that was what I thought. It’s worked like that to me till now. But now, there are other things like fate, destiny, luck, project managers, fat guys intervening. I don’t know how to take care of them. Or do I need to just wait & watch till time takes its toll. The other day someone told me to just “hang in there, it will happen in time”. I wish I were a simian or something.

How do I alter my luck or fate? Some great person said that the harder he tried, the luckier he got. I would love to believe this. Some others say that they can’t be altered. It’s written by the One, GOD. In my current situation, I would really love to see the script. I don’t remember the last time I went to a temple. Its not that I don’t believe in GOD or anything. I don’t accept the fact that I am not in control of the things in my life. One thing I believe is in Karma. I believe everybody gets only just about what he deserves. Of late, it has made me think whether this is what I deserve? If yes, why? If no, why not?

I struggle to find answers to a lot of questions. Do the answers lie with me? Oh! No, not another question.

Those 2 SMSs

I, for one, isn’t into the phenomenon of SMSing. Well, I have my own reasons for that. Iam also not the one who likes these “mushy” and “syrupy” SMS forwards. Neither very keen on the last joke made on a Sardar.

But, sometime ago I received a couple of SMSs that I really liked. They were long, yet simple and true to the core. The first one goes something like this:

Have you ever wondered what is college life about…its about the firsts for so many.. the first Independence, the first bike, the first cell, the first night out, the first crush, the first girl friend, the first kiss, the first break up, the first smoke, the first vodka, the first debonair, the first project, the first call letter, the first look of pride in parents’ eyes, the first feeling of responsibility, the first of so many and then finally the last of goodbyes.

The second one is:

Those “night outs”, those “midnight teas”, those “birthday bumps”, those “old torn jeans”, that same “rasam”, those “late night walks”, those “mother’s pickles” and that fight for them. Those “struggle for marks”..”fight with teachers”..”tears for love”..Those “B grade movies”..Those “plea for placements”..Just everything ..That’s college life..We call it “heaven”.. We are Engineers..

College life and more so our Engineering life, just couldn’t have been put in a better way. I think it takes 3 SMSs to make this one long message. But, hey! What the heck!

Things People Do (@Tech M)

And how…

I’ve been working in this company for a couple of years now. In this time I’ve come across many things that have made me question the very existence of the social human behavior (leave alone the core of it!), after all the corporate “etiquette” classes you have been through. Each and every time my patience has been put to test and some times to rest. Wish I had a Barretta to deal with them or something. Here is an account of them.

1. How lifts work

There are 2 arrow buttons besides a lift. In normal human behavior, the UP arrow is pressed when you want to go up and the DOWN arrow when you want to go down. Hey! But wait. In our company it works the other way around. Lifts get filled at the zeroth floor (mind you, the canteen is in this floor) on its way to the –1 level. So when the lift actually comes down, the only thing the people who do not have enough space to get in, manage is, a sheepish smile. Leave alone the silver-hair generation, the 20 somethings find it difficult to climb 3-4 floors.
The crowd on the zeroth floor is so much that when you come out of the lift, you will feel that there is some kinda mob war going on. You are not even given a chance to make a graceful exit. If you don’t get out in 0.27secs, chances are, you might get a free “lift”!
And they have to speak loudly inside the lift. A guy at the back is trying to “communicate” to the one in front in a crowded lift, redefining the means of communication. This is especially attributed to a certain clan(You know-who) of people. Miss the Barretta.

2. The Canteen Line

If you ever wanted to see a human chain championing their own cause, you should visit our company’s canteen. Actually this is not the point. The guy who is standing behind you for his rozi-roti has to be stuck on you. You can take me quite literally here. So much so that he is on your back like a bethaal (Vikram & Bethaal fame) or something.
The people have to take 2 spoons, although they will never use the “other”. They have to take a plate and hold it in their hands before their turn has actually come.

3. Personal Space

They have to outstretch their arms without seeing if you are invading someone’s space. Forget invading, sometimes you are lucky not to suffer a serious nose blow. Please feel free to do so, but not in the canteen please. Not in such a crowded place where you can actually lose your brother or sister!

4. Telephone Etiquette

Sounds like one of the boring workshops to attend. But, believe me you will be much happier when the people around you have indeed attended this workshop.
They have to speak loudly, be it with the client, mom, dad, friend, girl friend, cousin, cousin’s friend, and the credit card company, oblivious to the fact that there are people around who are pretending to work. When you are doing so your mobile has to ring or sing nowadays. Now they have to stair at the no. for a zillion years before they actually answer it, much to the relief of the people who are still pretending to work. Some people feel so much home at work that when they are on the phone, their divine feet are on the desk. Much like Mr.Bachchan in Deewar. The Barretta, still missing.

N.B. Please excuse Ayhay. He is born with a Dolby Digital Surround System in his throat.

5. Chair Theft

Fact, Chairs have wheels. So they can be moved from one place to another. One guy comes to meet the other. The chair of the guy, who has gone to the canteen to irritate me with his flexing and bethaal antics, becomes the victim. Another fact: chairs can travel cubicles, bays and if your fortuneteller has told you that your bad luck is really bad, it might have travelled wings. Truth is Iam also guilty of this. Tell me, who doesn’t like sitting?

6. The Parking

There are lines neatly drawn out in the parking area. But they can’t seem to stick to the boundaries. They have to put it out of the “boxes” right onto the “highway”, not even aware of the inconvenience that might be causing.

7. The ATM

They go into the ATM room, and draw money. I go into the ATM room and draw money. You go into the ATM and draw money. Difference is "they" take a mini statement, change their pin, take a mini statement of the ERA a/c, try to make card-to-card transfer and do not come out till all the items given in the menu are tried out. And then draw their money, the primary motive. All this, when there are people “urgently” waiting outside to get some money. Missing a Barretta, pretty badly.

My grievances are not just this much. This is only an initial draft. When the final draft comes out I’ll be ready with a gun!!

An Inconvenient Truth

Global Warming might seem like an age-old topic to write or read about. This subject crossed my head when I was reading about a book written by the former US Vice-President Al Gore and a debate going on with one of my friend. The book, An Inconvenient Truth has also been made to an eponymous titled movie.

Though the phenomenon of global warming was taken lightly initially, it has gained momentum in the last few years. A decade ago when I first had heard about this and made a trip to one my libraries looking for abstracts, I could barely find one in the journals. But today an Internet search on this subject finds a million pages. The subject has become deep rooted in public consciousness now, as much as Madonna or Gay rights are, at least in a few countries.

Perhaps all this attention is deserved. With the possible exception of another world war (N.Korea & Iran willing!), a giant asteroid, or an incurable plague, global warming may be the single largest threat to our planet. For decades human factories and cars have spewed billions of tons of greenhouse gases into the atmosphere, and the climate has begun to show some signs of warming. Many see this as a harbinger of what is to come. If we don’t curb our greenhouse emissions, then low-lying nations could be awash in seawater, rain and drought patterns across the world could change, hurricanes could become more frequent, and El Niño’s could become more intense.

An international organization which gathers a wide range of research results from around the world as a basis for predictions on climate change, made a very grave forecast in 2001: compared to 1990, the average temperature in 2100 would rise by 1.4 to 5.8 °C, while sea levels would rise by 9 to 88 cm. In order to avert this situation, the Kyoto Protocol, which imposes reductions in emissions of greenhouse gases and other measures came into force in February 2005. In this way, Japan and other countries around the world are working to reduce emissions of Greenhouse gases. But the US of A which is the primary contributor of CO2 to the atmosphere, has not signed this owing to its effect on the economy.

Instead of blaming others, lets see how each one of us can contribute, in a small but effective way. So, here are the 10 things to do from An Inconvenient Truth.

1. Change a light

Replacing one regular light bulb with a compact fluorescent light bulb will save 150 pounds of CO2 a year.

2. Drive less

Walk, bike, carpool or tale mass transit more often. You’ll save one pound of CO2 for every mile you don’t drive!

3. Recycle More

You can save 2400 pounds of CO2 per year by recycling just half of your household waste.

4. Check your tires

Keeping your tires inflated properly can improve gas mileage by more than 3%. Every gallon of gasoline saved keeps 20 pounds of CO2 out of atmosphere!

5. Use less hot water

It takes a lot of energy to heat water. Use less hot water by installing a low flow showerhead (350 pounds of CO2 saved per year) and washing your clothes in cold or warm water (500 pounds saved per year)

6. Avoid products with a lot of packaging

You can save 1200 pounds of CO2 if you cut down your garbage by 10%.

7. Adjust your thermostat

Moving your thermostat just 2 degrees in winter and up 2 degrees in summer. You can save 200 pounds of CO2 a year with this simple adjustment.

8. Plant a tree

A single tree will absorb one ton of CO2 over its lifetime,

9. Turn off your electronic devices

Simply turning off your television, DVD player, Stereo, Computer when you’re not using them will save you thousands of pounds of CO2 a year.

10. Finally, spread the word

The above things are just a small effort for a bigger cause, a greener planet and a safer future.

My 10 Favorite Hollywood Flicks

Seems like everybody is making their lists of “Bests”. So even I thought of putting in a list of the best “crap” I’ve watched in the last few years on the silver screen and my experiences with them. I have tried to put them chronologically. So here it is.

1. Gone With The Wind

You might remember this movie best for its poster, Rhett holding Scarlett. Probably the longest movie I’ve watched apart from The Ten Commandments and Ben-Hur, I think. The movie rambles on for 4 VCDs. At the end of the movie you are like “Frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn”. Thankfully the hero of the movie says it for you. Just Kiddin'!!!
The movie is based on the novel by Margaret Mitchell. The movie is about a rebellious woman Scarlett and her relations with her friends, family and her lovers set during the American Civil War. The movie is best to watch if you have the patience and the tenacity to hold up till the end. I personally feel such classics mean more when you watch them in one go. The above line is like the most memorable one ever said on the silver screen.

2. Citizen Kane

I watched this movie on my brother’s advice. I hunted for this movie in Video libraries, before I bought it. I was told that this one is like the “greatest movie ever made” in the history of Hollywood. Trust me when you are done watching it, you might just agree with them. I know, I did.
This movie is allegedly based on the life of newspaper magnate William Hearst. The protagonist (Kane) of the movie is a megalomaniac, who truly loves nothing, but power. Because of which he dies as a lonely recluse. This movie swept the Oscars and made Orson Welles a force to reckon.

3. Psycho

Watch this movie and you will fretter the next you step into the shower. That’s the genius of Alfred Hitchcock. This movie is based on a novel by Robert Bloch. But the kind of impact the movie has is incredible. Psycho is often seen as a path-breaking movie with an amazing storytelling and an even more amazing photography. The scene on the stairs is still fresh in my memories. The way the camera is moved in this scene is totally innovative for those times.
The movie is about a mentally disturbed hotel proprietor, Norman Bates and a secretary whom he kills in his motel. Psycho like any other Hitchcock Classic is timeless.

4. The Godfather

This is an adaptation of a novel by Mario Puzo of the same name. Just as the book revolutionized the literary world, the movie doesn’t fall short of its impact on the world of motion pictures. I can’t think of a movie, which has been made as good as the novel itself. This coupled with Marlon Brando’s acting, just leaves you in awe.
As a kid I remember my father and brother watching this and I had fallen asleep. Well, I was 10 then. Mafia didn’t mean more to me than a word of 5 letters! The movie is about a fictitious mafia family in New York. People say that its sequel is the best sequel ever. But I have my doubts with all due respect to Al Pacino’s acting. Quite naturally Brando won an Oscar for his acting that year.
The musical score sums up the “coldness” in the movie.

5. One Flew Over Cuckoo’s Nest

This movie is again an adaptation of an eponymous novel by Ken Kesey. This is easily Jack “Genius” Nicholson’s best performance on screen. His acting leaves you as insane as himself.
Randle McMurphy is a pretty criminal who declares himself insane to get into a mental institution to spend the rest of his life in comfort (comparatively). Apart from Jack’s insane act, the best I remember of the movie is a character that he calls “Chief”. A must watch for all J.Nicholson’s fans. This movie swept the Oscars winning in all 5 major categories.

6. Forrest Gump

This movie again like any other movie mentioned above is an adaptation of a novel. The movie was a brilliant commercial success. Tom Hanks delivers a very memorable performance. He surely is one of the best actors of our times. I watched this movie on TV, a couple of years after its release, and was totally blown away by the direction and acting.
The film tells the story of a simple man's epic journey through life, meeting historical figures and experiencing first-hand historic events while largely unaware of their significance, due to his low IQ of 75. The visual effects of Forrest meeting the historical figures is amazing.

7. The Shawshank Redemption

I have already written enough about this movie in my previos posts.

8. Braveheart

This is one of the movies which really inspired me as a kid. I didn’t like it when I watched it the first time(again with my brother), since it was a period movie. But when I watched it a few years later, I really admired it.
Braveheart is loosely based on the life of William Wallace, a freedom fighter of Scotland. The movie opens with the line “I shall tell you of William Wallace. Historians from England will say I am a liar, but history is written by those who have hanged heroes." Mel Gibson’s acting is simple comendable but he won an Oscar for his directing skills. The last scene is the most memorable one for me from this movie. He would be brought to a public square fro execution. Refusing the taunts of the executioner to accept subjectivity to the king, he yells his last word, "Freedom!”.

9. The Matrix

Put all sci-fi movies on one side and put Matrix on the other. This can be easily called the most influential path breaking action movie of our times. So much so that it got Malashri doing a Trinity in a Kannada movie !! I still remember watching the promo of The Matrix on US Top 10. I saw Neo dodging the bullets. I just looked at my brother in disbelief.

The film describes a future world in which the Matrix is an artificial reality created by sentient machines in order to pacify, subdue and make use of the human population as an energy source by growing them and connecting them to the Matrix with cybernetic implants. A must watch for all the geeks and to all those who “felt” there was something wrong with this world.

10. Gladiator

Never thought a movie in which a hero is wearing a skirt would become an all-time favorite to me!
Russel Crowe’s acting is nothing short of breathtaking. The director Ridley Scott’s effort of recreating the images of Rome and the amphitheatre is plaudable. This is one of those movies which you would like instantaneously. The dialogue delivery of Crowe is amazing. The scene in which he walks down to reveal his identity to Commodus is the high-point of the movie. A must watch to all Russel Crowe’s fans and to all those who aren’t his fans yet!!

When I was making this list there were many movies, I felt bad to have left out. But I guess this is what happens to any movie buff who goes to make a list of his “Bests”.

My Brother, Kiran

Iam the kinda of person who doesn’t get influenced by people around. There have a very few people who have been able to do so. My brother has been the biggest one.

I have grown up with my brother for the better part of my Life till now. I can say that growing up with my brother has been very good, with a certain sense of satisfaction.

We were like any other brothers growing up together. Except, not actually.

The brawls, the fun, the camaraderie (at times!), the expectations from parents, teachers to match my brother in Academia (failing miserably), my own expectations to match my brother in sports (failing miserably, again), stealing snacks from kitchen, getting posters for “my side” of the wall, making missile launchers with a piece of wood and 3 nails, playing cricket, squash, T.T. as soon as mom n dad would go out of the house, yes sir, we had it all.

When I was growing up I had this habit of aping anything he would do. I tried to dress like him, used to wrap my books the same way, putting a sticker on it, arranging the books in the bag, arranging the paraphernalia inside the “geometry” box, folding the handkerchief, placing it in the pocket, keeping money in the pocket, parking the bi-cycle and many more minute things that I can’t remember now. So much so that, I used to try to play soccer with my left-foot predominantly than my right one and ended on my backside once! Somewhere I feel that I even used to try to think like him.

The movies he watched, the soaps he watched, were also religiously watched by me. I still remember many movies that I made fun of when he used to watch, but have become my all-time favorite ones after he made me watch them like Forrest Gump, Braveheart, The Shawshank Redemption, The Wonder Years and so on.

After the formative years like above, things changed. He went to college in a different city but used to come home on weekends. We used to speak at length about his friends, college, people, life and so on and so forth. We would go up to 3AM in the morning at times. I can’t actually remember what we spoke, but it was a lot of fun and education. I simply would love it. This continued even after he begun working. Even to-date Iam all ears whenever he says something about profession, life and just about anything.

It’s been a long time now that he left abroad and hasn’t come back even once. I hope to seem him soon someday and maybe catch with all the things of the past. Of course it would be difficult because we are all “grown up” now. But I hope we will connect.

And yes, will try to ape some more…Thank You, Brother…For Everything...

The Shawshank Redemption

I watched the movie The Shawshank Redemption for the millionth time. And I can tell you that I can watch it a zillion times more. The difference was, this time I watched it on my Sony PSP. Small screen Big effect!!

The Shawshank Redemption is based on a Stephen King novella Rita Hayworth and Shawshank Redemption. It’s basically a prison drama, but much different from anything else you might have seen, about how to live your day-to-day life in desperately difficult times.

I still distinctly remember the first time I watched this movie ages ago. My brother had knocked on my head and had made me watch this movie, when I actually wanted to watch Lethal Weapon!

It's simple to say The Shawshank Redemption is about hope, but it is also about faith and love. The movie is primarily about two characters Andy Dufresne and Ellis "Red" Redding. The beauty of the movies lies in the contrasting lives of Andy and Red. One is very enigmatic and hopeful and the other is hopelessly hopeless. In spite of their contrasting attitudes they connect well. The acting is just top notch from both of them. Particularly Freeman’s acting is exceptional. His performance is so unshowy that it goes totally unoticed, but it’s the soul and “voice” of Shawshank.

In 1946, a banker named Andy Dufresne is convicted of a double murder, even though he stubbornly proclaims his innocence. He's sentenced to a life term at the Shawshank State Prison in Maine, where another lifer, Ellis "Red" Redding, picks him as the new recruit most likely to crack under the pressure. The ugly realities of prison life are quickly introduced to Andy: a corrupt warden, sadistic guards led by Capt. Byron, and inmates who are little better than animals, willing to use rape or beatings to insure their dominance. But Andy does not crack: he has the hope of the truly innocent, which (together with his smarts) allow him to prevail behind bars. He uses his banking skills to win favor with the warden and the guards, doing the books for Norton's illegal business schemes and keeping an eye on the investments of most of the prison staff. In exchange, he is able to improve the prison library and bring some dignity and respect back to many of the inmates, including Red. Finally he escapes from the prison with no clue left behind. Red and Andy are united at the end of the movie after the former is paroled.

After the movie is over it makes you look back and wonder. The film is not actually about prison life. Shawshank is indeed the name of a prison and most of the movie is within prison walls and about a warden, guards, and inmates. But they are just side notes to the symphony about friendship, loyalty and most prominently “Hope”. This explains the title’s allusion to Redemption.

The memorable surprises in the film are only the icing on a carefully crafted cake. When the director spins the story upside down, it is only after we have invested our hearts and minds into these characters. Only later do we realize the plot has underlined the emotions all the while. We squeal with delight and hope as the movie folds. We feel compelled to rewind and watch it all again.

On second visits you will find insights into a plethora of nuances that crave discovery-minute expressions and missed dialogue often not caught in the first viewing. You will experience this each and every time you watch it. And every time you watch, Andy and Red’s redemption warms our hearts. Their continuing ability to hope, spontaneously rubs on us.

The last few lines of the movie just waltzes you away.

Sure I remember the name. Zihuatanejo. A name like that is just too pretty to forget.
I find I am excited, so excited I can hardly hold the pencil in my trembling hand. I think it is the excitement that only a free man can feel, a free man starting a long journey whose conclusion in uncertain.
I hope Andy is down there.
I hope I can make it across the border.
I hope to see my friend and shake his hand.
I hope the Pacific is as blue as it has been in my dreams.
I hope.

This movie gives a fresh lease of life to anyone who has lost hope. So lets “Get busy living or get busy dying”.

Champions

A champion (identical to the French, from the late Latin campio) is one who has repeatedly come out first among contestants in challenges (especially the winner of a tournament or other competition) or other test, one who is outstandingly skilled in their field.

Over the last weekend I witnessed 3 champions in their own rights and fields. Martina Navaratilova, Micheal Schumacher and Roger Federer.

Martina, born in Czech Republic, winner of 18 Grand Slam Single titles, 41 Grand Slam Doubles titles, 9 Wimbledon titles and the indisputably the greatest female tennis player of all time.

Michael, born in Germany, 7 is the number of F1 world championships, 90 is the number of races he has won and by sheer weight of numbers alone, the greatest F1 Driver ever.

Roger, born in Switzerland, winner of 9 Grand Slam titles, 11 Masters titles, and the present world No.1 in men’s tennis by a distance and practically a “living legend”.

One thing is sure; you don’t become a champion overnight!! Many factors go into making a champion. Firstly they have goals and missions, coupled with a burning desire for success and a great motivation to turn their dreams into reality. But it’s not merely wanting to become the best, but certainly goes beyond that.

No champion is alike in having the same set of characters to win. Every champion has a different reason, which propels him towards the goal. Wilma Rudolph, who astonished the world with her running abilities by winning three gold medals in the 1960s Olympic games, was born with a childhood disease that forced her to wear a special leg brace until she was 11. She said, "My first goal was to get rid of that ugly shoe and walk and run like the other kids." When she discovered she had talent, she wanted to be the best, but didn't dream she would become the best in the world. The great diver, Greg Loganis, had a similar childhood problem. Mary Lou Retton admitted that she wouldn't have become a champion without her coach. Some have fought back excruciating pain to win. For Mark Spitz, it was mostly pride and fear that brought him to seven goal medals at the Munich Olympic games.

There is so much we can learn from these champs, which can help us to become a “champion” in our own rights. We can implement some of these qualities in our professional lives; instill them in our peers and subordinates and build better organizations. We must be willing to forgo temporal pleasures to achieve a more worthwhile goal.

Martina and Michael may have bid adieu, but their legends will live forever…

The American Dream

Growing up watching Hollywood movies I heard the actors allusion to ‘Living the American Dream’. It took me some time to actually understand it. You ever wondered what the ‘American Dream’ is about?

The American Dream is a dream of success, fame and wealth achieved in the United States of America. It's thought to be achievable by "hard work, courage, and determination", or by "getting rich quick" The concept often involves moving upward in the social classes, and may involve icons such as car, house, partner and pet!

The concept of the American dream has had its share of criticsm from many writers and economists. The main criticism is that it is misleading. These critics say that, for various reasons, it simply is not possible for everyone to become prosperous through determination and hard work alone. The consequences of this belief can include the poor feeling that it is their fault that they are not successful.

Today I saw a person living the American Dream. It was Taylor Hicks, winner of American Idol Season 5.

American Idol, formally known as American Idol: The Search for a Superstar, is an American television show. It is a replica of the UK show Pop Idol, a singing talent contest to determine the best "undiscovered" young singer in the country.

The winner gets the title of ‘American Idol’ of course, a 5-album major record deal with Sony BMG, a summer concert tour and a track on the season’s compilation album. ufffff!!!

In the show, hosted by Ryan Seacrest, hopeful contestants are screened by preliminary panels to be selected for singing talent or humorous potential and human interest. Those who pass the prelims are potentially aired on the show. They then audition before the three main judges - Simon Cowell (one of the judges from Pop Idol), Paula Abdul, and Randy Jackson - in selected cities across the United States.

I started watching American Idol just to hear the comments of Simon Cowell. His acerbic style of judging, hard to please personality was a major reason for this show becoming popular. Cowell's fame (or infamy) grew, fed by his deliberately insincere signature phrase, "I don't mean to be rude, but …". The best part was in one of the episodes when a contestant said, he has a “personality”, to which Simon replied “You have personality!! Dogs have personality!!”. This paragraph is a misfit in this post, but that’s how much I enjoyed it!!

Watching the show over for a few weeks, I was amazed by the kind of hard work that the contestants put into singing. And the kind of consistency required to come out tops is simply amazing amidst such competition. You falter once, you can pretty much expect to be voted out by the american audience, who vote in millions every week.
After 4 months of intense competition, Taylor Hicks, a guy from the Birmingham city of Alabama won the competition. He finished with his arms in the air, eyes closed, singing “Iam living the American Dream”…….

Yes, even I want to live such a Dream...

Faith v/s Rationality

I lost the race of who would watch the movie ‘The Da Vinci Code’ first, to Rupa. Not that it was any of my mistake, you understand!!

Apparently the movie has run into a controversy in India like in many other nations. But here, its come to the brink of being banned. If it happens so I would be disappointed, so would be a lot of people.

So what is the ‘Da Vinci Code’ all about? I haven’t read the book myself, but going by what I have read in the newspapers, it’s about the notion of Christianity’s Holy Grail being more than a chalice from which Jesus drank at the Last Supper. It’s about a premise that Jesus married Mary Magdalene and produced children, whose descendants are alive today. The Holy Grail is the metaphorical portrayal of Mary Magdalene. This is vehemently protested by parts of the Roman Catholic Church. So, the government has asked the sensor board to have a second look.

Later it was decided that the movie would be released with an ‘A’ certificate and a disclaimer that the movie is a part of fiction. To this neither the producers, Sony Pictures nor the director, Ron Howard is ready to agree.

Of all the Christianity following nations in the world, I don’t think the producers would have expected such protests from a country like us. But when it comes to religion, people get a little ‘touchy’ about things. For Christ’s sake, it’s just a goddamn movie. If it wasn’t for all this controversy, people would have just watched the movie and completely forgotten about it. Going to the extent of banning it, would only make it look like ‘The Forbidden Fruit’.

Of the 2% of the Christians living in this country, I guess not more that 5% of the 2% would have watched the movie. And I don’t think the faith of Christianity in them is so poor that watching a fictional tale would shake their beliefs. In fact, the Vatican and even Opus Dei (the targeted sect in the movie) don’t seem to have any problem with the movie. 36 countries have reviewed this film and not banned it, so are we just coming out of Stone Age?

Is Christianity a conspiracy? Is “The Da Vinci Code” a dangerous, anti-Christian hoax? What’s up with Tom Hanks’s hair (the Japanese PM loved it)? Frankly, I don’t care. Public memory is very short. After a few months nobody would even remember what the fuss was all about. In a secular country like ours, where the government has to appease everyone, the release of this movie does hang by the Damocles’ sword. Then I wouldn’t be left with any other choice than to “unlock the code” in the print version!!

And I Don't Want to be Alone...

Loneliness is about the scariest thing out there.
- Joss Whedon (Creator of Buffy)

Loneliness is and always has been the central and inevitable experience of every man.
- Thomas Wolfe

My heart is a gypsy - continuously searching for a home, fighting within itself, wondering whether it is weak or even right for that matter to be searching in the first place. Lonliness is what it feels like...
- Jenna Jameson

This is what some great people have to say about loneliness….And I’ll tell you I know what exactly they are talking about and I know so do you .

One morning you get up and the person you wish see the most is not there…you are scared...you look for a way out desperately...the harder you try, the tougher it becomes...Bang!! Lonliness hits...

In this mindset, you will be no longer able to enjoy the friendship, companionship you have. You feel like a mathematical anomaly; divided by two when alone and multiplied by three when at a social circle. Nothing feels right.

You go out just to put your mind to something else, only to fail miserably. The memories of the places you had been, the times you spent will play back and again. You just wish that this is a dream. You badly wish you wake up from your bed that very moment. Alas! Life’s not so fair.

The worst part of feeling this loneliness is that you start to feel that you are alone. There is a chain reaction of the thoughts. You start pitying yourself. I’ll tell you self pity is like the lousiest thought one should ever get.
It makes you weak. It destroys you.

There is just only one thought when you go to sleep, that tomorrow dawns a better day...where you don’t feel lonely or alone...

I'm on a wheel of fortune with a twist of fate

'Cause I know it isn't heaven, is it love or hate

Am I the subject of the pain

Am I the stranger in the rain

I am alone

And if there glory there to behold

Maybe it's my imagination

Another story there to be told

So I play, I'll wait

And I pray it's not too late

We came so far

Just a beat of a lonely heart

And it's mine

I don't want to be alone

Monty Python

Monty Python, or The Pythons, is the collective name of the creators and stars of Monty Python’s Flying Circus, a British television comedy sketch show, started way back in 1969. I didn’t have a clue of who these guys are. On my recent visit to Mysore, one of my ol’ pals Prajwal gave me these 2 movies made by the pythons’ in the 70’s and promised me a good laugh. Knowin’ him for some time, I knew what kind of humour the movie had, only not exactly!!

The first one I watched was The Holy Grail.

This film is based on the King Arthur’s quest for the Holy Grail. It begins with these credits like any other movie, but very different. It has proper names at the top, but the below credit lines speak some very funny, strange, non-english lines which doesn’t make any sense. They apologise for the fault in the sub-titles only to goof up again. Read it..

We apologise for the fault in thesubtitles. Those responsible have beensacked.

Mynd you, m?bites Kan be pretty nasti...

We apologise again for the fault in thesubtitles. Those responsible for sackingthe people who have just been sacked,have been sacked.

The story begins with King Arthur (Graham Chapman) recruiting Knights of the Round Table throughout England. He is initially frustrated at his recruiting attempts several times eventually, he is joined by Sir Bedevere the Wise, Sir Lancelot the Brave, Sir Galahad called both the Chaste and the Pure Sir Robin the Not-Quite-So-Brave-As-Sir-Lancelot ,and the aptly named Sir Not-Appearing-In-This-Film (they show a baby dressed as a knight in a frame..)

Once assembled, the knights receive a quest from an animated version of God to find the Holy Grail. In their search, they encounter the perils of Castle Anthrax ,the Knights who say Ni (these guys really cracked me up!), a killer rabbit , and a gigantic cartoon monster, The Legendary Black Beast of Aaaargh. (They are saved when the animator suffers a fatal heart attack.) This reminded me of the joke that Chandler cracks in FRIENDS, that he doesn’t want to cry just because the cartoonist stopped drawing!! (when ‘Bambi’ dies).

The best part of the movies is when Arthur is at the bridge of death along with his accomplices. They are at this bridge guarded by this witch, whose 3 questions have to be answered to allow them to cross. This is what happens…

BRIDGEKEEPER: Stop! Who would cross the Bridge of Death must answer me these questions three, ere the other side he see.
LAUNCELOT: Ask me the questions, bridgekeeper. I am not afraid.
BRIDGEKEEPER: What... is your name?
LAUNCELOT: My name is 'Sir Launcelot of Camelot'.
BRIDGEKEEPER: What... is your quest?
LAUNCELOT: To seek the Holy Grail.
BRIDGEKEEPER: What... is your favorite color?
LAUNCELOT: Blue.
BRIDGEKEEPER: Right. Off you go.
LAUNCELOT: Oh, thank you. Thank you very much.
ROBIN: That's easy!
BRIDGEKEEPER: Stop! Who approacheth the Bridge of Death must answer me these questions three, ere the other side he see.
ROBIN: Ask me the questions, bridgekeeper. I'm not afraid.
BRIDGEKEEPER: What... is your name?
ROBIN: 'Sir Robin of Camelot'.
BRIDGEKEEPER: What... is your quest?
ROBIN: To seek the Holy Grail.
BRIDGEKEEPER: What... is the capital of Assyria?
[pause]
ROBIN: I don't know that! Auuuuuuuugh!
BRIDGEKEEPER: Stop! What... is your name?
GALAHAD: 'Sir Galahad of Camelot'.
BRIDGEKEEPER: What... is your quest?
GALAHAD: I seek the Grail.
BRIDGEKEEPER: What... is your favourite color?
GALAHAD: Blue. No, yel-- auuuuuuuugh!
BRIDGEKEEPER: Hee hee heh. Stop! What... is your name?
ARTHUR: It is 'Arthur', King of the Britons.
BRIDGEKEEPER: What... is your quest?
ARTHUR: To seek the Holy Grail.
BRIDGEKEEPER: What... is the air-speed velocity of an unladen swallow?
ARTHUR: What do you mean? An African or European swallow?
BRIDGEKEEPER: Huh? I-- I don't know that. Auuuuuuuugh!
BEDEVERE: How do know so much about swallows?
ARTHUR: Well, you have to know these things when you're a king, you know.

The film ends abruptly when a group of police from the 1970s interrupt the climactic battle scene to arrest Sir Lancelot for the murder of a "famous historian" very much like him earlier in the film. The Grail presumably is left in the hands of the Frenchmen in Castle Aaaargh…….

Amazingly the film was shot with a budget of $300,000 only, and even more amazingly, money was raised in part with donations from rock groups such as Pink Floyd and Led Zeppelin. Worth a cause….

Now, the second one was Life of Brian.

Brian is born in the stable a few doors down from the one in which Jesus was born (a fact which initially confuses the three wise men come to praise him, as they must instead put up with his boorish mother Mandy...this was simply hilarious at the least). He grows up to be an idealistic young man who resents the continuing Roman occupation of Judea. While attending the Sermon on the Mount he becomes infatuated with an attractive young rebel, who persuades him to join one of the many fractious and bickering separatist movements plotting to strike at the Roman occupiers. His first assignment as a rebel is an attempt at scrawling some graffiti on the wall of the governor's palace. This succeeds beyond his wildest dreams when he is caught by a passing Roman guard who, in disgust at Brian's use of improper Latin grammar, reacts in a manner resembling that of an old-fasioned English grammar school teacher and forces him to copy out the 'correct' message one hundred times as 'punishment'. He ends up adorning the whole palace with his 'punishment'..this is worth a watch..

Unfortunately, a failed raid on the palace, a resulting series of unfortunate coincidences, and some meaningless babble recited as an attempt to avoid the Roman guards, leads a small army of people to come to regard Brian as the Messiah. Despite his best efforts to (a) convince people that this isn't the case and (b) try and use his influence to get people to embrace their individuality and not rely on authority figures (advice which is merely parrotted unthinkingly back at him), he is arrested, sentenced to death, crucified, and abandoned by anyone who could possibly help him. Still, got to "Always Look on the Bright Side of Life".

The scene in which Brian tries to drive away his ‘followers’ with his speech from the window is pretty interseting and funny.

Brian: 'Look, you've got it all wrong! You don't NEED to follow ME, you don't NEED to follow ANYBODY! You've got to think for yourselves! You're ALL individuals!'
The Crowd: 'Yes! We're all individuals!'
Brian: 'You're all different!'
The Crowd: 'Yes, we ARE all different!'
Man in crowd: 'I'm not...'
The Crowd: 'Shhhh!'

The song at the end of the movie, "Always Look on the Bright Side of Life" is too gud and pretty true, with which eventually the movie ends with the crucified prisoners singing.

Cheer up, Brian. You know what they say.
Some things in life are bad.
They can really make you mad.
Other things just make you swear and curse.
When you're chewing on life's gristle,
Don't grumble. Give a whistle.
And this'll help things turn out for the best.
And...
Always look on the bright side of life.

If life seems jolly rotten,
There's something you've forgotten,
And that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing.
When you're feeling in the dumps,
Don't be silly chumps.
Just purse your lips and whistle. That's the thing.
And...
Always look on the bright side of life.

For life is quite absurd
And death's the final word.
You must always face the curtain with a bow.
Forget about your sin.
Give the audience a grin

Enjoy it. It's your last chance, anyhow.
So,...
Always look on the bright side of death,
Just before you draw your terminal breath.

Life's a piece of shit,
When you look at it.
Life's a laugh and death's a joke. It's true.
You'll see it's all a show.
Keep 'em laughing as you go.
Just remember that the last laugh is on you.
And...

I read somewheer that, ironically, this song was later re-released with great success, after being sung by British football fans. The increase in popularity, though, became evident in 1982 during the Falklands War when British sailors, injured in an Argentine attack, started singing it. Indeed, many people have come to see the song as a life-affirming ode to optimism.

Another interesting thing I read that the producer of the movie was George Harrison(ex-beatle). He especilally created “Handmade Films” just to produce this movie. George & many Brits apparently believed that The Pythons were the answer to Beatles in Comedy!!!

I heard there is one more to the series..The Meaning of Life. Prajwal willin’ I hope to complete the trilogy..

The Unsent Letter

Dear Bambs,

These are the thoughts that cross my mind as you move away to bigger things in life. Like a flock of homesick cranes flying back to their mountain nests, we are all pilgrims on life’s journey. We keep journeying, never arriving. There is always a further bend along the road to negotiate or another road to travel. I guess this uncertainty, is what inspires us when we wake up in the morning.

I read somewhere that there are many goodbyes, we have to say, before we can say our “eternal hello”. All along our journey we have to keep letting go: Of places, people and events. Some doors close, others open. Every transition in life is the closing of one door and the opening of another. But only the ones who are ready to walk through the “opened” door can see the “eternal sunshine”.

I sincerely believe that only few of us are prepared for life’s transitions. We try to cling to what seems an irrevocable part of us. But ultimately we let go, with all the pain going’ into a hiding somewhere in our hearts. Part of us is comfortable with it, but another part resists the inevitable, causing pain.

In an excerpt from the poem “Miles to Go”, Robert Frost says,

The Woods are lovely dark and deep,
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.

Farewell Dear…..

A Bigger House

Raghu left to UK on Sunday after 2 days of hectic "rolling" around all over the place. Now that he has gone there is a big void at home.

V5 is never the same without Ayhay a.k.a Imaan . Or for that matter even if anyone of the rest are missing. Such is the bond that has developed over the past 18 months. But, I guess somewhere you have to get used to the fact that nothing is permanent but change.

One of the songs by Byrds rings in my head in such a situation.

To everything, turn, turn, turn.
There is a season, turn, turn, turn.
And a time to every purpose under heaven.
A time to be born, a time to die.
A time to plant, a time to reap.
A time to kill, a time to heal.
A time to laugh, a time to weep.

Yes, its a season of changing times.....

Being Cyrus

First Punch: Being Cyrus is a offbeat subject and very artistic and may not appeal to the masses.

Those who were fortunate enough to watch Spike Jones' "Being John Malkovich" may find subtle references to the Cyrus movie other than just the movie titles!!

The interesting thing about the movie is how it speaks in subtle meatphors. Several sequences are interconnected at the conclusion to give the audience a "ohh" and "AAHHH" in thier heads. The story uncovers in a very strange way with a few dream sequences interwoven in between. The background music and the story's ambient setting give a haunting feel.

Cyrus(Saif) walks into the Dinshaw household following an Ad to work as an apprentice to Dinshaw Sethna (Naseerudin Shah) in pottery and sculpting. During his stay at the Dinshaws', he develops an intimacy with Katy(Dimple), Dinshaw's wife, who apparently believes that she is married to a loser.

Dinshaw and Farukh(Bomman) are diametrically opposite brothers, who don't feel much for each other. Thier father lives with Farukh in a Parsi locality in Mumbai. While Farokh doesn't treat his father well, Cyrus tries to befriend the old man. This is when the threads in the story begin to connect together and you slowly get a hang of the game in Cyrus' mind.

Being Cyrus is directed by Homi Adjania, and is pretty good for a debut. The movie has some sure elements of Film Noir, and has a lot of quaint mysticism.

The acting of Bomman and the Police Inspector(???) adds a lot of humour(Black) to this much serious movie. Saif is brilliant in portraying Cyrus Mistry, but you might get turned off by a lot of hamming by Dimple.

The movie got a lot of cheer for a couple of dialogues in the theatre. One was when Saif quotes Leo Tolstoy " Every happy family resembles the other, and every unhappy family is unique in its own way" in the background at the dysfunctional family of the Dinshaw's. And the other is "When the game is over, the King and the pawns go into the same box".

The first half of the movie takes you on an enigmatic ride with a major twist setting in the second half. Even though the movie has very strong characters and a conclusion that catches you off guard, I felt the movie falters at the end. Frankly, I came out of the movie "Being Stupid" and hearing a lot of strange voices in my head!!!

Bottomline: It's a movie which won't let you rest in your seat. Being Cyrus is like entering someone's mind (Think Being John Malkovich) and watching his dreams, thoughts, fears and desires. Now you take your own call to watch the movie or not!!!

Brokeback Mountain

I happened to watch a movie called Brokeback Mountain a few days ago..

Spoiler/Warning: Its a high-culture gay cowboy movie...

Wonder why I went 2 watch??....damn the Academy Awards, media hype,harsha-gokul etal....
The first hour of the movie was very dreary..(shorter than the usual screen, fellow watchers more keen on Aus v/s RSA tie, intimate scenes b/n jake n heath didn't help the cause ), but in the end, it turned out to be an excellent movie(read the conversation between jake n heath below).
In an extended opening act that the film later relies on, to deliver the crux of its emotional weight, Ennis (Ledger) and Jack (Gyllenhaal) find work on Brokeback Mountain and meet while shepherding sheep along its photogenic terrain (Rupa kept screaming "wallpapers" all the time). There a romance blossoms and a bond grows between them, though it is forced into the closet once the summer ends and their independent lives shuffle forward (guys made an animated huge sigh of relief in the hall!!).
Marriage and family soil the purity of their relationship although the pull each feels towards the other doesn't dwindle as the years roll by. .. . and ends in a rather anti-climax sorts.....
The last 40 minutes of the movie was worth all the pain of the initial 90 minutes.
There were 2 kinda of audiences that came out of the movie hall.
One group, had the satisfaction of watchin' a good old fashioned love story...(of any 2 ppl!!!) and the other wonderin' "How God..How??", summed up by 2 guy frnds tellin' each other that they have watched their last movie together...:)
As for me Iam a part of both the groups!!!!
This scene alone is worth the admission price...
Ennis Del Mar: I’m gonna tell you this one time, Jack fuckin’ Twist, an’ I ain’t foolin’. What I don’t know - all them things I don’t know - could get you killed if I come to know them. I mean it.Jack Twist: Yeah well try this one, and I’ll say it just once!Ennis Del Mar: Go ahead!Jack Twist: Tell you what, we coulda had a good life together! Fuckin’ real good life! Had us a place of our own. But you didn’t want it, Ennis! So what we got now is Brokeback Mountain! Everything’s built on that! That’s all we got, boy, fuckin’ all. So I hope you know that, even if you don’t never know the rest! You count the damn few times we have been together in nearly twenty years and you measure the short fucking leash you keep me on - and then you ask me about Mexico and tell me you’ll kill me for needing somethin’ I don’t hardly never get. You have no idea how bad it gets! I’m not you… I can’t make it on a coupla high-altitude fucks once or twice a year! You are too much for me Ennis, you sonofawhoreson bitch! I wish I knew how to quit you.Ennis Del Mar: [crying] Well, why don’t you? Why don’t you just let me be? It’s because of you that I’m like this! I ain’t got nothing… I ain’t nowhere… Get the fuck off me! I can’t stand being like this no more, Jack.
Jack Twist: God, I wish I knew how to quit you!Ennis Del Mar: Well, why don’t you?

Bottomline: Its not exactly a "cinema" sorta movie....but definitely watchable once...

Ay - Hoi!!!

Trying to post a comment to Viky's blog and a little time off from work has brought me to the world of Blogs, the BLOGOSPHERE.

I feel blog offers you a descent outage to pour out the angst, cheer, disappointments and most of all gives you a chance to try your hand in writing!!!

So, Here I Go........