Tuesday, September 01, 2009

A Ticket To Ride

They were all lined up outside the shrine. I went and joined it. There were so many cutting across an entire age spectrum. From toddlers to octogenarians. If they were made to stand in an ascending order of their ages you can teach that toddler counting to a hundred!
The shrine is located in a place where hot winds blow with just a couple of hours into the sunrise. And this obviously doesn't help the already tense faces. I could see a spot of bother even on the li'l baby in front of me. The wannabe students looked very tense. They had to prove that they were going there only for academic purposes (Ah!). The corporate boys and girls were as usual nattily dressed, looked boring and pretty composed. The old timers had come meticulously dressed and with all the necessary papers neatly filed up in a folder and with the spirit of a teenager.

After total frisking we were let inside. Inside our credentials were frisked. They take "xerox" of different combinations of your fingers. Sometimes its just the middle fella indicated by the priest with careful gesturing as not to hurt any sentiments. But little do they know that the disciples would do or take just about anythng for a ticket to el dorado.
When frisking my credentials I'm told that my photograph can't be older than 6 months! You should have told me before! Atleast in fine print somewhere! But then you are not supposed to question them. I just kept staring at the "old" photograph trying to figure out the changes in my facial anatomy in 6 months. I was shocked to find the changes or rather the lack of it!
I was not the only one looking "radically different" from the photo. There was this one month old baby also. Even better there was this really ol' woman who could barely walk or see with no photos at all! Old and wise! I hope when she does use the "ticket" she wont go too far!
However the priests were kind enough to provide us with on-the-spot pictures. The only problem was that the device to do that was broke. So we were presented with a life time oppurtunity to sun bathe in the shrine! Meanwhile the father of the one month ol' baby was given the task of waking up the baby cause its eyes have to be opene when its clicked. I have to say that he resorted to some violent techniques once his lame ways were not working. Amnesty International wasn't around. It was safe.

After the dehydrated face was clicked, I awaited for my turn with the priests. Infront of me the powder puffed lady had a a tough time convincing the priest her motive. She failed miserably. The next guy came up even more needy. He began promulgating his "awesomeness" even before greeting the priest. She was naturally not impressed. I dont think he got the ticket either.
Next up was some one from the same fraternity as mine. He was eloquent with the answers. When his ticket was confirmed he started salivating and thanking the priests profusely. If it wasn't for the barrier he would have been warming their feet in a jiffy. Subservience at its characteristic best!
The lad in front of me had to take a barrage of questions since he was from a company lesser mortal. At one point of time it looked like he was defending his innocence. If the defending had continued for some more time he might have well been read the miranda law. And finally yours truly walked up and got his ticket issued before one could wink twice. Maybe working for one of the trusted institutions of uncle sam does help.
The only problem was that my old ticket was cut in half.