It had been a long time since I had heard a song to relate to or found interesting to interpret, until I heard, 'Waiting for my real life to begin' by Colin Hay, on the way to office. This song kicked up a lot of images in my head and started playing them frame by frame. I could relate to the song so well that I could attach each line in the song with a frame in my head. I was so into the song that it seemed like all this was happening in the sub-conscious mind, until the suspension less office "RV" threw me high enough to come to consciousness.
Any minute now, my ship is coming in
I'll keep checking the horizon
I'll stand on the bow, feel the waves come crashing
Come crashing down, down, down, on me
And you say, be still my love
Open up your heart
Let the light shine in
But don't you understand
I already have a plan
I'm waiting for my real life to begin
When I awoke today, suddenly nothing happened
But in my dreams, I slew the dragon
And down this beaten path, and up this cobbled lane
I'm walking in my old footsteps, once again
And you say, just be here now
Forget about the past, your mask is wearing thin
Let me throw one more dice
I know that I can win
I'm waiting for my real life to begin
Any minute now, my ship is coming in
I'll keep checking the horizon
And I'll check my machine, there's sure to be that call
It's gonna happen soon, soon, soon
It's just that times are lean
And you say, be still my love
Open up your heart, let the light shine in
Don't you understand
I already have a plan
I'm waiting for my real life to begin
At the outset, the man (the main character) seems restless ("Suddenly nothing happened”,” Any minute now”,” check my machine"). But if you look at it closely it is the anticipation, the ambition that has come out by looking forward to the adventures that lie ahead in his new life. He is ready to take one more chance (Let me throw one more dice) for all that its worth for, because he is sure (I know that I can win) this time. He reassures her (the second character) to keep the faith in him (I already have a plan).
The part that I loved the most was:
When I awoke today, suddenly nothing happened
But in my dreams, I slew the dragon
And down this beaten path, and up this cobbled lane
I'm walking in my old footsteps, once again
And you say, just be here now
Life continues on, and our dreams end up unfulfilled; but that doesn't mean the dreams can't exist over and over again. It is the second character that says - its okay, don't worry so much about it, we can still make it happen.
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
Monday, November 23, 2009
The Big Apple
When I set off from India, visiting new york city was at the top of my agenda. I've always being fascinated by what I heard and seen of this city. So after a lot of aborted plans due to bad weather, work and "evil" forces, I finally made it there.
Got off early from work on friday and drove straight to Boston, picked up a couple of friends and set off to the capital of the world, after running a couple of errands. The fact that we were going to stay in downtown Manhattan came as an icing on the cake, courtesy, my friend's smart sibling, who happens to work in wall street.
After 3+ hours of driving, around midnight, we entered NYC, where my eyes were thrown wide open to the breathtaking steel skyline of Manhattan. It was the one of the most beautiful things I had ever seen. But the best was yet to come.
The pace of the city was terrific. Even at 2AM the roads were filled with cars, with people driving in a hurry. One could sense the state of urgency in everything they were doing. It was truly like the "city that never sleeps".
The following day we were treated to a terrible weather. It kept raining in intervals dampening our spirits. a li'l. It took us till late in the afternoon to get out. The first stop was the wall street due to its proximity. The place was abuzz with a lot of tourists. It was lined with skyscrapers on either side, with the landmark buildings being the NYSE and the Trump building. But the main attraction was the Charging Bull, the iconic sculpture, which epitomizes the market prosperity. It was funny and shocking to find tourists grabbing the Bull's balls. I was told abut a myth that doing so, helps your cash flow it seems. If only! And no, I didn't touch anything! But in retrospection, maybe I should have.
The next stop was the Brooklyn bridge, the integral part of the NY skyline. This connects the NY boroughs, Manhattan and Brooklyn. We walked over the pathway on the bridge which spans a little over a mile. And on our way back it was dusk, making everything look so beautiful. And from there we took the subway and went to the Times Square. Its the stop to make for anyone visiting NYC.
As we came up from the subway, the sight I saw will remain fresh in my mind for a long time. I felt like walking through the wardrobe into Narnia! The lights, the energy, the huge animated billboards was just spectacular. It was truly fantastical.
I could see people from different ethnicities, cultures and walks of life. It was like the confluence of the people of the world. No wonder its sometimes referred to as the "Crossroads of the World". It was a dream come true!
After walking a round a while we went to Hard Rock Cafe, had a couple of drinks and an argument with a few drunk locals. It was fun ;)
The next day, although not very keen, we went to the Liberty island which has the statute of liberty. Considering that more than 3 million people visit this each year, we didn't want to go back and say that we went to NY, but didn't see the statue. But it was worth the visit. Its truly a wonderful piece of monument, where the woman wearing a stola, with a torch in her hand, breaking the shackles is surging ahead. Its a wholesome personification of freedom.
After getting back from the island we were treated to an awesome show of street dancing by a group of afros at the battery park. They were very acrobatic too. It was simply mind blowing.
After roaming a round a while and some shopping we got back to the apartment in the evening, waiting for a friend to head back home.
In between I went up to the roof deck. And what I saw there will probably be the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. The whole city was glowing. The skyscrapers were lit. The bridges were lit. The water underneath the bridge sparkled. I could see the city stretch far and long. The light from the headlight of the cars seemed to flowing like water. And I was all alone. It was like an unseen dream come true. But for some reason it didn't fell like complete.
However, It was the prefect view to say goodbye to the city.
Thursday, October 08, 2009
Wet Wednesday
The alarm kept ringing and I kept snoozing. Is it already time to be up? The light was too dim but the time was all right. When I pulled the blinders it didn't get any bright either. It was dark, hazy and raining. I was late for work. Didn't understand whether to blame the overcast conditions, the blinders or the last night's draught.
Hit the shower. Fixed my breakfast. And by the time I was halfway through the cereals I was relaxed. I was gonna be late anyways. The car was parked at a distance. I should have bought that flowery umbrella in the mall yesterday. But my ego wouldn't let me. Perhaps it wouldn't let me get wet either. Made a quick sprint to the car. Fastened the seat belts and told myself that I've got to stick to the right side throughout the day.
After a couple of turns I entered the freeway. There is a strange sound that you get when drive on freeways. Its just too difficult to drive with the windows pulled down. Not that I would. The rains had got heavier and the dark skies spelt doomsday.
As I made it to one of the main lanes I tuned into a radio station. They were playing the LZ classic 'Stairway to Heaven'. And suddenly I started feeling good about the whole rain doomsday combo. The dry leaves that were deposited under the windshield started taking off one by one, traveling along the windshield and flying away on top of the car as my foot got heavy on the pedal. It was like they were taking turns. It was harmonious.
Meanwhile there were these heavy trailers that were whizzing past me. As they passed they kicked up so much water from the road and deposited it on my windshield. It was like going through the tunnel at a car wash. But I simple love the sight of these huge long trailers.
On my way to office I get off the freeway to take a short cut which is like totally picturesque. The roads are narrow and the limit is 40. The road has beautiful country homes, a beautiful placid lake and a lot of trees on either side. A good place to take the fall foliage report.
And finally I enter the last phase. A 2 mile winding road inside the office campus to to the garage. The road, with all its curves and people trying to stick to their lane and with the wet roads, gives the quintessential adrenalin rush to go the desk with some energy. I had to park in the open roof garage and run in the rain to do the 8 hour drill of laughing at terrible jokes, nodding comprehensively at the things I don't comprehend, hearing fake accents and pretending that I love my job. hmph!
Tuesday, October 06, 2009
Culturally Shocked!
The first steps that you take in an alien nation is always an interesting one. No matter what people have told you what to expect, experiencing it, is startling nevertheless.
It all started with the breathtaking view of the country side of NE which is as beautiful as it gets anywhere in fall i guess. Then all the rhetoric that I ever had heard began to play. Its so clean everywhere. The roads don't bump. Where are all the speed breakers? Total strangers greeting each other. And so on.
This place is like a village with all the things considered luxurious back home. I've never seen so many trees on the roadside ever before. Given an option I would have wanted to stay in a metro. But the city lights ain't far either.
The office is in a sprawling campus of 550 acres. Its more like a tree farm. Recently, an employee went for a walk in the campus's woods after lunch, only to be lost in the farm. 911 had to be dialed to rescue him!
This country likes everything big. From burgers to cars. From roads to malls. And it likes things fast. From food to sports. From cars to work. And they like it different. They call a sport football, but barely use their foot. They play world series without letting the rest of the world know about it. They prefer to be right than left when driving. They ask for cola with a lot of ice while wearing jackets and sweatshirts.
They have a clear demarcation between their person and professional lives. I've barely seen anyone work overtime. They value an animal's life as much as they value a human life. On weekends you see a lot of people setting out with their boats tagged to their car or canoes or bikes mounted on the car. They head out to a ball game very passionately with their team's shirts and caps to the stadias or the sports bars. They make mondays interesting by hosting MNL (monday night live) games. They swear by customer satisfaction. They took my friend's PS3 back after a month of its purchase because he said he doesn't like its design!
All in all, you just can't stop being amazed looking at this country.
Tuesday, September 01, 2009
A Ticket To Ride
They were all lined up outside the shrine. I went and joined it. There were so many cutting across an entire age spectrum. From toddlers to octogenarians. If they were made to stand in an ascending order of their ages you can teach that toddler counting to a hundred!
The shrine is located in a place where hot winds blow with just a couple of hours into the sunrise. And this obviously doesn't help the already tense faces. I could see a spot of bother even on the li'l baby in front of me. The wannabe students looked very tense. They had to prove that they were going there only for academic purposes (Ah!). The corporate boys and girls were as usual nattily dressed, looked boring and pretty composed. The old timers had come meticulously dressed and with all the necessary papers neatly filed up in a folder and with the spirit of a teenager.
After total frisking we were let inside. Inside our credentials were frisked. They take "xerox" of different combinations of your fingers. Sometimes its just the middle fella indicated by the priest with careful gesturing as not to hurt any sentiments. But little do they know that the disciples would do or take just about anythng for a ticket to el dorado.
When frisking my credentials I'm told that my photograph can't be older than 6 months! You should have told me before! Atleast in fine print somewhere! But then you are not supposed to question them. I just kept staring at the "old" photograph trying to figure out the changes in my facial anatomy in 6 months. I was shocked to find the changes or rather the lack of it!
I was not the only one looking "radically different" from the photo. There was this one month old baby also. Even better there was this really ol' woman who could barely walk or see with no photos at all! Old and wise! I hope when she does use the "ticket" she wont go too far!
However the priests were kind enough to provide us with on-the-spot pictures. The only problem was that the device to do that was broke. So we were presented with a life time oppurtunity to sun bathe in the shrine! Meanwhile the father of the one month ol' baby was given the task of waking up the baby cause its eyes have to be opene when its clicked. I have to say that he resorted to some violent techniques once his lame ways were not working. Amnesty International wasn't around. It was safe.
After the dehydrated face was clicked, I awaited for my turn with the priests. Infront of me the powder puffed lady had a a tough time convincing the priest her motive. She failed miserably. The next guy came up even more needy. He began promulgating his "awesomeness" even before greeting the priest. She was naturally not impressed. I dont think he got the ticket either.
Next up was some one from the same fraternity as mine. He was eloquent with the answers. When his ticket was confirmed he started salivating and thanking the priests profusely. If it wasn't for the barrier he would have been warming their feet in a jiffy. Subservience at its characteristic best!
The lad in front of me had to take a barrage of questions since he was from a company lesser mortal. At one point of time it looked like he was defending his innocence. If the defending had continued for some more time he might have well been read the miranda law. And finally yours truly walked up and got his ticket issued before one could wink twice. Maybe working for one of the trusted institutions of uncle sam does help.
The only problem was that my old ticket was cut in half.
The shrine is located in a place where hot winds blow with just a couple of hours into the sunrise. And this obviously doesn't help the already tense faces. I could see a spot of bother even on the li'l baby in front of me. The wannabe students looked very tense. They had to prove that they were going there only for academic purposes (Ah!). The corporate boys and girls were as usual nattily dressed, looked boring and pretty composed. The old timers had come meticulously dressed and with all the necessary papers neatly filed up in a folder and with the spirit of a teenager.
After total frisking we were let inside. Inside our credentials were frisked. They take "xerox" of different combinations of your fingers. Sometimes its just the middle fella indicated by the priest with careful gesturing as not to hurt any sentiments. But little do they know that the disciples would do or take just about anythng for a ticket to el dorado.
When frisking my credentials I'm told that my photograph can't be older than 6 months! You should have told me before! Atleast in fine print somewhere! But then you are not supposed to question them. I just kept staring at the "old" photograph trying to figure out the changes in my facial anatomy in 6 months. I was shocked to find the changes or rather the lack of it!
I was not the only one looking "radically different" from the photo. There was this one month old baby also. Even better there was this really ol' woman who could barely walk or see with no photos at all! Old and wise! I hope when she does use the "ticket" she wont go too far!
However the priests were kind enough to provide us with on-the-spot pictures. The only problem was that the device to do that was broke. So we were presented with a life time oppurtunity to sun bathe in the shrine! Meanwhile the father of the one month ol' baby was given the task of waking up the baby cause its eyes have to be opene when its clicked. I have to say that he resorted to some violent techniques once his lame ways were not working. Amnesty International wasn't around. It was safe.
After the dehydrated face was clicked, I awaited for my turn with the priests. Infront of me the powder puffed lady had a a tough time convincing the priest her motive. She failed miserably. The next guy came up even more needy. He began promulgating his "awesomeness" even before greeting the priest. She was naturally not impressed. I dont think he got the ticket either.
Next up was some one from the same fraternity as mine. He was eloquent with the answers. When his ticket was confirmed he started salivating and thanking the priests profusely. If it wasn't for the barrier he would have been warming their feet in a jiffy. Subservience at its characteristic best!
The lad in front of me had to take a barrage of questions since he was from a company lesser mortal. At one point of time it looked like he was defending his innocence. If the defending had continued for some more time he might have well been read the miranda law. And finally yours truly walked up and got his ticket issued before one could wink twice. Maybe working for one of the trusted institutions of uncle sam does help.
The only problem was that my old ticket was cut in half.
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
October Sky
How often do you watch a movie and get a sense of true exhilaration? Maybe one in a hundred! My one in hundred was ‘October Sky’. It so full of spirit and letter-perfect filmmaking that I defy anyone to watch this movie without getting a tingle in his or her heart. Thrilling in the best sense of the word, traditional without being corny and with a script, photography and symbolism that could be the basis for any film maker wanting to make a classic.
A must watch for all those who believe in the triumph of true human spirit against all odds.
A must watch for all those who believe in the triumph of true human spirit against all odds.
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Water Under The Bridge
It was pretty mean. Maybe I should not have said that.
I read somewhere that at any given moment, the brain has 14 billion neurons firing at a speed of 450 miles per hour. We don’t have control over most of them. When we get a chill... goose bumps. When we get excited... adrenaline. When we get angry… expletives. The body naturally follows its impulses, which I think is part of what makes it so hard for us to control. Of course, sometimes we have impulses we would rather not control, that we later wish we had.
The body is actually a slave to its impulses. But the thing that makes us human is what we can control. After the storm, after the rush, after the heat of the moment has passed, we can cool off and clean up the messes we made. We can try to let go of what was. Cause it’s being said already. Cause it’s being done already.
But then…
I read somewhere that at any given moment, the brain has 14 billion neurons firing at a speed of 450 miles per hour. We don’t have control over most of them. When we get a chill... goose bumps. When we get excited... adrenaline. When we get angry… expletives. The body naturally follows its impulses, which I think is part of what makes it so hard for us to control. Of course, sometimes we have impulses we would rather not control, that we later wish we had.
The body is actually a slave to its impulses. But the thing that makes us human is what we can control. After the storm, after the rush, after the heat of the moment has passed, we can cool off and clean up the messes we made. We can try to let go of what was. Cause it’s being said already. Cause it’s being done already.
But then…
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
10 Ways to Avoid Mucking Up the World Any Worse Than It Already Is
Invariably the commencement and graduation speeches are packed with “true” life experiences of the speaker or moldering quotes of great Greek philosophers. And once in a while there is a speech which breaks the monotony or the mold and makes the talk truly memorable for the graduates as the day itself.
There is the one by Steve Jobs delivered at Stanford where he urged the students to think different and to “Stay hungry, Stay foolish”. And the humorous one by the English comic Baron Cohen a.k.a Ali G at Harvard in his unique cockney slang. The great three word speech by Winston Churchill at Harrow school. And even the famous “wear sunscreen” speech at MIT that actually never happened.
But one of the very interesting ones that I came across was the one by the famous American columnist and political satirist, Russell Baker at Connecticut College.
Read the complete address below:
"In a sensible world I would now congratulate the Class of 1995 and sit down without further comment. I am sure the Class of 1995 wishes I would do so. Unfortunately for the Class of 1995 we do not live in a sensible world.
"We live in a world far more slavish in its obedience to ancient custom than we like to admit. And ancient commencement-day custom demands that somebody stand up here and harangue the poor graduates until they beg for mercy. The ancient rule has been: make them suffer. I still remember the agony of my own graduation at The John Hopkins University.
"They had imported some heat from the Sahara Desert especially for the occasion, and the commencement orator spoke for two and a half days. That was in 1947.
"Luckily, the forces of mercy have made big gains since then. The authorities of Connecticut College have suggested that for me to speak longer than 20 minutes would be regarded as cruel and inhuman punishment and that if I go as long as 30 minutes several strong men will mount this platform and forcibly remove me. But if I can finish in 15 minutes - 15 minutes! - they will let me stay for lunch. They know their man, ladies and gentleman. When I smell a free lunch, I go for it.
"So if I can do this right, you'll see the back of me before we get to minute 16. This will not be easy. Condensing a graduation speech into 15 minutes is like trying to squeeze a Wagnerian opera into a telephone booth. To do it I had to strip away all the frills. This means you don't even get any warm-up jokes. So those of you who came just for the jokes might as well leave now.
"All right, let's plunge right ahead into the dull part. That's the part where the commencement speaker tells the graduates to go forth into the world, then gives advice on what to do when they get out there. This is a ridiculous waste of time. The graduates never take the advice, as I have learned from long experience. The best advice I can give anybody about going out into the world is this: Don't do it. I have been out there. It is a mess.
"I have been giving graduates this advice ever since 1967 when I spoke to a batch of them over at Bennington. That was 28 years ago. Some of your parent were probably graduating there that day and went on to ignore my advice.
"Thanks to the genius of my generation, I told them, it was a pretty good world out there - they went forth into it, they would mess it up. So I urged them not to go.
"I might as well have been shouting down a rain barrel. They didn't listen. They went forth anyhow. And look what happened. Within a year Martin Luther King and Robert Kennedy were murdered. Then Nixon took us all to The Watergate. Draft riots. Defeat in Vietnam. John Lennon killed. Ronald Reagan and his trillion-dollar deficit.
"Over the years I spoke to many graduating classes, always pleading with them: Whatever you do, do not go forth.
"Nobody listened. They kept right on going forth anyhow. And look what we have today: Newt Gingrich and Bill Clinton.
"So I will not waste my breath today pleading with you not to go forth. Instead I limit myself to a simple plea: When you get out there in the world try not to make it any worse than it already is. I thought it might help to give you a list of the hundred most important things you can do to avoid making the world any worse. Since I'm shooting for 15 minutes, however, there is no time to give you all 100. You will have to make do with 10. Short as the public attention span is these days, nobody could remember 100 anyhow. Even 10 may be asking too much.
"You remember the old joke about how television news would have reported the story of the Ten Commandments: 'God today issued 10 commandments, three of which are...'
"He is my list: 10 things to help you avoid making the world worse than it already is:
"One: Bend down once in a while and smell a flower.
"Two: Don't go around in clothes that talk. There is already too much talk in the world. We've got so many talking people there's hardly anybody left to listen. With radio and television and telephones we've got talking furniture. With bumper stickers we've got talking cars. Talking clothes just add to the uproar. If you simply cannot resist being an incompetent klutz, don't boast about it by wearing a tee shirt that says 'underachiever and proud of it.' Being dumb is not the worst thing in the world, but letting your clothes shout it out loud depresses the neighbors and embarrasses your parents.
"Point three follows from point two, and it's this: Listen once in a while. It's amazing what you can hear. On a hot summer day in the country you can hear the corn growing, the crack of a tin roof buckling under the power of the sun. In a real old-fashioned parlor silence so deep you can hear the dust settling on the velveteen settee, you might hear the footsteps of something sinister gaining on you, or a heart-stoppingly beautiful phrase from Mozart you haven't heard since childhood, or the voice of somebody - now gone - whom you loved. Or sometime when you're talking up a storm so brilliant, so charming that you can hardly believe how wonderful you are, pause just a moment and listen to yourself. It's good for the soul to hear yourself as others hear you, and next time maybe, just maybe, you will not talk so much, so loudly, so brilliantly, so charmingly, so utterly shamefully foolishly.
"Point four: Sleep in the nude. In an age when people don't even get dressed to go to the theater anymore, it's silly getting dressed up to go to bed. What's more, now that you can no longer smoke, drink gin or eat bacon and eggs without somebody trying to make you feel ashamed of yourself, sleeping in the nude is one deliciously sinful pleasure you can commit without being caught by the Puritan police squads that patrol the nation.
"Point five: Turn off the TV once or twice a month and pick up a book. It will ease your blood pressure. It might even wake up your mind, but if it puts you to sleep you're still a winner. Better to sleep than have to watch that endless parade of body bags the local news channel marches through your parlor.
"Six: don't take your gun to town. Don't even leave it home unless you lock all your bullets in a safe deposit box in a faraway bank. The surest way to get shot is not to drop by the nearest convenience store for a bottle of milk at midnight, but to keep a loaded pistol in you own house. What about your constitutional right to bear arms, you say. I would simply point out that you don't have to exercise a constitutional right just because you have it. You have the constitutional right to run for president of the United States, abut most people have too much sense to insist on exercising it.
"Seven: learn to fear the automobile. It is not the trillion-dollar deficit that will finally destroy America. It is the automobile. Congressional studies of future highway needs are terrifying. A typical projection shows that when your generation is middle-aged, Interstate 95 between Miami and Fort Lauderdale will have to be 22 lanes wide to avert total paralysis of south Florida. Imagine an entire country covered with asphalt. My grandfather's generation shot horses. Yours had better learn to shoot automobiles.
"Eight: Have some children. Children add texture to your life. They will save you from turning into old fogies before you're middle-aged. They will teach you humility. When old age overtakes you, as it inevitably will I'm sorry to say, having a few children will provide you with people who will feel guilty when they're accused of being ungrateful for all you've done for them. It's almost impossible nowadays to find anybody who will feel guilty about anything, including mass murder. When you reach the golden years, your best bet is children, the ingrates.
"Nine: Get married. I know you don't want to hear this, but getting married will give you a lot more satisfaction in the long run than your BMW. It provides a standard set of parent for your children and gives you that second income you will need when it's time to send those children to Connecticut College. What's more, without marriage you will have practically no material at all to work with when you decide to write a book or hire a psychiatrist.
"When you get married, whatever you do, do not ask a lawyer to draw up a marriage contract spelling out how your lives will be divvied up when you get divorced. It's hard enough making a marriage work without having a blueprint for its destruction drawn up before you go to the altar. Speaking of lawyers brings me to point nine and a half, which is: Avoid lawyers unless you have nothing to do with the rest of your life but kill time.
"And finally, point 10: smile. You're one of the luckiest people in the world. You're living in America. Enjoy it. I feel obliged to give you this banal advice because, although I've lived through the Great Depression, World War II, terrible wars in Korea and Vietnam, and half a century of cold war, I have never seen a time when there were so many Americans so angry or so mean-spirited or so sour about the country as there are today.
"Anger has become the national habit. You see it on the sullen faces of fashion models scowling out of magazines. it pours out of the radio. Washington television hams snarl and shout at each other on television. Ordinary people abuse politicians and their wives with shockingly coarse insults. Rudeness has become an acceptable way of announcing you are sick and tired of it all and are not going to take it anymore. Vile speech is justified on the same ground and is inescapable.
"America is angry at Washington, angry at the press, angry at immigrants, angry at television, angry at traffic, angry at people who are well off and angry at people who are poor, angry at blacks and angry at whites. The old are angry at the young, the young angry at the old. Suburbs are angry at the cities, cities are angry at the suburbs. Rustic America is angry at both whenever urban and suburban invaders threaten the rustic sense of having escaped from God's angry land. A complete catalog of the varieties of bile poisoning the American soul would fill a library. The question is: why? Why has anger become the common response to the inevitable ups and down of nation life? The question is baffling not just because the American habit even in the worst of times has traditionally been mindless optimism, but also because there is so little for Americans to be angry about nowadays. We are the planet's undisputed super power. For the first time in 60 years we enjoy something very much like real peace. We are by all odds the wealthiest nation on earth, though admittedly our vast treasure is not evenly shared.
"Forgive me the geezer's sin of talking about "the bad old days," but the country is still full of people who remember when 35 dollars a week was considered a living wage for a whole family. People whine about being overtaxed, yet in the 1950s the top income-tax rate was 91 percent, universal military service was the law of the land, and racial segregation was legally enforced in large parts of the country.
"So what explains the fury and dyspepsia? I suspect it's the famous American ignorance of history. People who know nothing of even the most recent past are easily gulled by slick operators who prosper by exploiting the ignorant. Among these rascals are our politicians. Politicians flourish by sowing discontent. They triumph by churning discontent into anger. Press, television and radio also have a big financial stake in keeping the county boiling mad.
"Good news, as you know, does not sell papers or keep millions glued to radios and TV screens.
"So when you get out there in the world, ladies and gentlemen, you're going to find yourself surrounded by shouting, red-in-the-face, stomping-mad politicians, radio yakmeisters and, yes sad to say, newspaper columnists, telling you 'you never had it so bad' and otherwise trying to spoil your day.
"When they come at you with that , ladies and gentlemen, give them a wink and a smile and a good view of your departing back. And as you stroll away, bend down to smell a flower.
"Now it seems I have run past the 15-minute limit and will have to buy my own lunch. That's life Class of 1995. No free lunch.
"My sermon is done."
There is the one by Steve Jobs delivered at Stanford where he urged the students to think different and to “Stay hungry, Stay foolish”. And the humorous one by the English comic Baron Cohen a.k.a Ali G at Harvard in his unique cockney slang. The great three word speech by Winston Churchill at Harrow school. And even the famous “wear sunscreen” speech at MIT that actually never happened.
But one of the very interesting ones that I came across was the one by the famous American columnist and political satirist, Russell Baker at Connecticut College.
Read the complete address below:
"In a sensible world I would now congratulate the Class of 1995 and sit down without further comment. I am sure the Class of 1995 wishes I would do so. Unfortunately for the Class of 1995 we do not live in a sensible world.
"We live in a world far more slavish in its obedience to ancient custom than we like to admit. And ancient commencement-day custom demands that somebody stand up here and harangue the poor graduates until they beg for mercy. The ancient rule has been: make them suffer. I still remember the agony of my own graduation at The John Hopkins University.
"They had imported some heat from the Sahara Desert especially for the occasion, and the commencement orator spoke for two and a half days. That was in 1947.
"Luckily, the forces of mercy have made big gains since then. The authorities of Connecticut College have suggested that for me to speak longer than 20 minutes would be regarded as cruel and inhuman punishment and that if I go as long as 30 minutes several strong men will mount this platform and forcibly remove me. But if I can finish in 15 minutes - 15 minutes! - they will let me stay for lunch. They know their man, ladies and gentleman. When I smell a free lunch, I go for it.
"So if I can do this right, you'll see the back of me before we get to minute 16. This will not be easy. Condensing a graduation speech into 15 minutes is like trying to squeeze a Wagnerian opera into a telephone booth. To do it I had to strip away all the frills. This means you don't even get any warm-up jokes. So those of you who came just for the jokes might as well leave now.
"All right, let's plunge right ahead into the dull part. That's the part where the commencement speaker tells the graduates to go forth into the world, then gives advice on what to do when they get out there. This is a ridiculous waste of time. The graduates never take the advice, as I have learned from long experience. The best advice I can give anybody about going out into the world is this: Don't do it. I have been out there. It is a mess.
"I have been giving graduates this advice ever since 1967 when I spoke to a batch of them over at Bennington. That was 28 years ago. Some of your parent were probably graduating there that day and went on to ignore my advice.
"Thanks to the genius of my generation, I told them, it was a pretty good world out there - they went forth into it, they would mess it up. So I urged them not to go.
"I might as well have been shouting down a rain barrel. They didn't listen. They went forth anyhow. And look what happened. Within a year Martin Luther King and Robert Kennedy were murdered. Then Nixon took us all to The Watergate. Draft riots. Defeat in Vietnam. John Lennon killed. Ronald Reagan and his trillion-dollar deficit.
"Over the years I spoke to many graduating classes, always pleading with them: Whatever you do, do not go forth.
"Nobody listened. They kept right on going forth anyhow. And look what we have today: Newt Gingrich and Bill Clinton.
"So I will not waste my breath today pleading with you not to go forth. Instead I limit myself to a simple plea: When you get out there in the world try not to make it any worse than it already is. I thought it might help to give you a list of the hundred most important things you can do to avoid making the world any worse. Since I'm shooting for 15 minutes, however, there is no time to give you all 100. You will have to make do with 10. Short as the public attention span is these days, nobody could remember 100 anyhow. Even 10 may be asking too much.
"You remember the old joke about how television news would have reported the story of the Ten Commandments: 'God today issued 10 commandments, three of which are...'
"He is my list: 10 things to help you avoid making the world worse than it already is:
"One: Bend down once in a while and smell a flower.
"Two: Don't go around in clothes that talk. There is already too much talk in the world. We've got so many talking people there's hardly anybody left to listen. With radio and television and telephones we've got talking furniture. With bumper stickers we've got talking cars. Talking clothes just add to the uproar. If you simply cannot resist being an incompetent klutz, don't boast about it by wearing a tee shirt that says 'underachiever and proud of it.' Being dumb is not the worst thing in the world, but letting your clothes shout it out loud depresses the neighbors and embarrasses your parents.
"Point three follows from point two, and it's this: Listen once in a while. It's amazing what you can hear. On a hot summer day in the country you can hear the corn growing, the crack of a tin roof buckling under the power of the sun. In a real old-fashioned parlor silence so deep you can hear the dust settling on the velveteen settee, you might hear the footsteps of something sinister gaining on you, or a heart-stoppingly beautiful phrase from Mozart you haven't heard since childhood, or the voice of somebody - now gone - whom you loved. Or sometime when you're talking up a storm so brilliant, so charming that you can hardly believe how wonderful you are, pause just a moment and listen to yourself. It's good for the soul to hear yourself as others hear you, and next time maybe, just maybe, you will not talk so much, so loudly, so brilliantly, so charmingly, so utterly shamefully foolishly.
"Point four: Sleep in the nude. In an age when people don't even get dressed to go to the theater anymore, it's silly getting dressed up to go to bed. What's more, now that you can no longer smoke, drink gin or eat bacon and eggs without somebody trying to make you feel ashamed of yourself, sleeping in the nude is one deliciously sinful pleasure you can commit without being caught by the Puritan police squads that patrol the nation.
"Point five: Turn off the TV once or twice a month and pick up a book. It will ease your blood pressure. It might even wake up your mind, but if it puts you to sleep you're still a winner. Better to sleep than have to watch that endless parade of body bags the local news channel marches through your parlor.
"Six: don't take your gun to town. Don't even leave it home unless you lock all your bullets in a safe deposit box in a faraway bank. The surest way to get shot is not to drop by the nearest convenience store for a bottle of milk at midnight, but to keep a loaded pistol in you own house. What about your constitutional right to bear arms, you say. I would simply point out that you don't have to exercise a constitutional right just because you have it. You have the constitutional right to run for president of the United States, abut most people have too much sense to insist on exercising it.
"Seven: learn to fear the automobile. It is not the trillion-dollar deficit that will finally destroy America. It is the automobile. Congressional studies of future highway needs are terrifying. A typical projection shows that when your generation is middle-aged, Interstate 95 between Miami and Fort Lauderdale will have to be 22 lanes wide to avert total paralysis of south Florida. Imagine an entire country covered with asphalt. My grandfather's generation shot horses. Yours had better learn to shoot automobiles.
"Eight: Have some children. Children add texture to your life. They will save you from turning into old fogies before you're middle-aged. They will teach you humility. When old age overtakes you, as it inevitably will I'm sorry to say, having a few children will provide you with people who will feel guilty when they're accused of being ungrateful for all you've done for them. It's almost impossible nowadays to find anybody who will feel guilty about anything, including mass murder. When you reach the golden years, your best bet is children, the ingrates.
"Nine: Get married. I know you don't want to hear this, but getting married will give you a lot more satisfaction in the long run than your BMW. It provides a standard set of parent for your children and gives you that second income you will need when it's time to send those children to Connecticut College. What's more, without marriage you will have practically no material at all to work with when you decide to write a book or hire a psychiatrist.
"When you get married, whatever you do, do not ask a lawyer to draw up a marriage contract spelling out how your lives will be divvied up when you get divorced. It's hard enough making a marriage work without having a blueprint for its destruction drawn up before you go to the altar. Speaking of lawyers brings me to point nine and a half, which is: Avoid lawyers unless you have nothing to do with the rest of your life but kill time.
"And finally, point 10: smile. You're one of the luckiest people in the world. You're living in America. Enjoy it. I feel obliged to give you this banal advice because, although I've lived through the Great Depression, World War II, terrible wars in Korea and Vietnam, and half a century of cold war, I have never seen a time when there were so many Americans so angry or so mean-spirited or so sour about the country as there are today.
"Anger has become the national habit. You see it on the sullen faces of fashion models scowling out of magazines. it pours out of the radio. Washington television hams snarl and shout at each other on television. Ordinary people abuse politicians and their wives with shockingly coarse insults. Rudeness has become an acceptable way of announcing you are sick and tired of it all and are not going to take it anymore. Vile speech is justified on the same ground and is inescapable.
"America is angry at Washington, angry at the press, angry at immigrants, angry at television, angry at traffic, angry at people who are well off and angry at people who are poor, angry at blacks and angry at whites. The old are angry at the young, the young angry at the old. Suburbs are angry at the cities, cities are angry at the suburbs. Rustic America is angry at both whenever urban and suburban invaders threaten the rustic sense of having escaped from God's angry land. A complete catalog of the varieties of bile poisoning the American soul would fill a library. The question is: why? Why has anger become the common response to the inevitable ups and down of nation life? The question is baffling not just because the American habit even in the worst of times has traditionally been mindless optimism, but also because there is so little for Americans to be angry about nowadays. We are the planet's undisputed super power. For the first time in 60 years we enjoy something very much like real peace. We are by all odds the wealthiest nation on earth, though admittedly our vast treasure is not evenly shared.
"Forgive me the geezer's sin of talking about "the bad old days," but the country is still full of people who remember when 35 dollars a week was considered a living wage for a whole family. People whine about being overtaxed, yet in the 1950s the top income-tax rate was 91 percent, universal military service was the law of the land, and racial segregation was legally enforced in large parts of the country.
"So what explains the fury and dyspepsia? I suspect it's the famous American ignorance of history. People who know nothing of even the most recent past are easily gulled by slick operators who prosper by exploiting the ignorant. Among these rascals are our politicians. Politicians flourish by sowing discontent. They triumph by churning discontent into anger. Press, television and radio also have a big financial stake in keeping the county boiling mad.
"Good news, as you know, does not sell papers or keep millions glued to radios and TV screens.
"So when you get out there in the world, ladies and gentlemen, you're going to find yourself surrounded by shouting, red-in-the-face, stomping-mad politicians, radio yakmeisters and, yes sad to say, newspaper columnists, telling you 'you never had it so bad' and otherwise trying to spoil your day.
"When they come at you with that , ladies and gentlemen, give them a wink and a smile and a good view of your departing back. And as you stroll away, bend down to smell a flower.
"Now it seems I have run past the 15-minute limit and will have to buy my own lunch. That's life Class of 1995. No free lunch.
"My sermon is done."
Friday, April 17, 2009
Rain Down On Me
The city got its first bit of serious rains of the year tonight. The locals have been wanting this more than the elections or the IPL. With the mercury ever so rising to levels never observed in almost half a century, the showers came as a much needed respite.
The most welcome rains are those that break the stinky summer sweat. It truly is one of those small things that bring great joy.
Here, when it rains, it pours. And when it pours, it takes the electricity with it. And this annoys the oldies at my house cause they can't see another of their "favorite" child sing or the evil MIL plotting something against her DIL.
But I think being "powerless" takes the attention away from the mundane things of our lives and it gets us to notice the wonder of the rains.
The experience of the tonight's rain was simply sublime.
The smell before the rains reminds me of the summer vacations of the childhood. As the rain starts to fall perpendicularly to the ground the tempo of the sound increases. This drowns out the noise of the vehicles. There is not a hint of wind. The motionless tree looks like a work of art with the aurora and the rain in its background. The rain drops weigh down the floating dust particles and nails them to the ground. I stand at the window as drops of rain ricochet from the leaves of the plants and onto my face. I just close my eyes. I feel it giving me a complete wash down and draining all the jadedness.
I feel revitalized.
The most welcome rains are those that break the stinky summer sweat. It truly is one of those small things that bring great joy.
Here, when it rains, it pours. And when it pours, it takes the electricity with it. And this annoys the oldies at my house cause they can't see another of their "favorite" child sing or the evil MIL plotting something against her DIL.
But I think being "powerless" takes the attention away from the mundane things of our lives and it gets us to notice the wonder of the rains.
The experience of the tonight's rain was simply sublime.
The smell before the rains reminds me of the summer vacations of the childhood. As the rain starts to fall perpendicularly to the ground the tempo of the sound increases. This drowns out the noise of the vehicles. There is not a hint of wind. The motionless tree looks like a work of art with the aurora and the rain in its background. The rain drops weigh down the floating dust particles and nails them to the ground. I stand at the window as drops of rain ricochet from the leaves of the plants and onto my face. I just close my eyes. I feel it giving me a complete wash down and draining all the jadedness.
I feel revitalized.
Wednesday, April 08, 2009
A Clockwork Orange, Redux
I just couldn't help writing after watching this wonderful movie from the American indie genre, Donnie Darko. The eponymous protagonist played brilliantly by Jake Gyllenhal represents all that infests the tortured head of a particular sullen boy, a schizophrenic teenager flailing and failing to find relief amid the ''normal'' crisis of adolescence. He is very reminiscent of JD Salinger's cynical anti-hero Holden Caulfield. And there is this song “Mad World” at the climax which just blows you away with its beautiful lyrics. It almost sounded like a revisit to the mood of one of my previous posts. You should probably hear this song before you continue reading to make any sense of what I'm interpreting of the song. Here is the link to the song (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5MyMOi4LEr4)
I think this is the strange reality of the world we live in. You feel so isolated from the people who could be your closest friends. But you could connect to the expressionless faces of people whom you don’t know and who don’t care whether you're ok because they're worn out. They are too wrapped up in their own problems to recognize that anyone else maybe struggling to keep going.
You feel so low and so lonely that only your dreams reflect how you truly feel. And the only dreams that are any good are the ones in which you are dying. In fact you have never had better dreams because these dreams show the true you. But at the same time you want someone to realize that you are not ok and you want help but you just don’t know how to ask for help because it is so hard and that makes you feel so alone in this mad world.
All children should feel happy on their birthday but it isn’t so. When you go to school it is like everywhere else. It’s like you are invisible. No one sees what’s wrong. They "look right through me” and this hurts so bad that they don’t see you, like you and your feelings don’t matter at all.
And once again you mean nothing. It’s so funny, in a way ironic even that the dreams in which you’re dying are the best you've ever had and the thought that your life has gotten this bad is saddening. This mad world can be so painful.
I listen to this song and to me it describes how it feels when you are depressed. It’s a great song and if you took the time to listen, you would know a little of what it feels like. It sucks.
I think this is the strange reality of the world we live in. You feel so isolated from the people who could be your closest friends. But you could connect to the expressionless faces of people whom you don’t know and who don’t care whether you're ok because they're worn out. They are too wrapped up in their own problems to recognize that anyone else maybe struggling to keep going.
You feel so low and so lonely that only your dreams reflect how you truly feel. And the only dreams that are any good are the ones in which you are dying. In fact you have never had better dreams because these dreams show the true you. But at the same time you want someone to realize that you are not ok and you want help but you just don’t know how to ask for help because it is so hard and that makes you feel so alone in this mad world.
All children should feel happy on their birthday but it isn’t so. When you go to school it is like everywhere else. It’s like you are invisible. No one sees what’s wrong. They "look right through me” and this hurts so bad that they don’t see you, like you and your feelings don’t matter at all.
And once again you mean nothing. It’s so funny, in a way ironic even that the dreams in which you’re dying are the best you've ever had and the thought that your life has gotten this bad is saddening. This mad world can be so painful.
I listen to this song and to me it describes how it feels when you are depressed. It’s a great song and if you took the time to listen, you would know a little of what it feels like. It sucks.
Monday, March 30, 2009
Watercooler Moment
A couple of faces which looked like just out of college walked to the cooler where I was filling up. They were waiting behind me for their turn.
One told the other "Dude, I was busy all weekend arranging stuff for my grampa's 80th birthday. I still haven't bought a present for him. Any suggestions?"
The other nonchalantly says “Dude, get a coffin”.
I've never laughed so hard with strangers before!
One told the other "Dude, I was busy all weekend arranging stuff for my grampa's 80th birthday. I still haven't bought a present for him. Any suggestions?"
The other nonchalantly says “Dude, get a coffin”.
I've never laughed so hard with strangers before!
Monday, March 23, 2009
Too Much
When you were a Kid, it was mom’s handmade sweets. You stole it, hid it from your parents and siblings and binged on it until your stomach gave in and you fell sick. In college it was the heady combo of youth, booze and irresponsibility. Now as an adult, you take as much of the good as you can get … because it doesn’t come around nearly as often as it should or as you would want. Cause good things aren’t always what they seem. Too much of anything, even the sublime is not a good thing.
How do you know how much is too much? Too much, too soon. Too much information. Too much fun. Too much love. Too much to ask. Too much to give. Too much pain. And when is it all just too much to bear?
The fantasy is simple. Pleasure is good, and twice as much pleasure is better. That pain is bad, and no pain is better. But the reality is different. The reality is that pain is there to tell us something, and there's only so much pleasure we can take without getting a stomach ache. And maybe that's okay. Maybe some fantasies are only supposed to be lived in our dreams where too much is just too good.
How do you know how much is too much? Too much, too soon. Too much information. Too much fun. Too much love. Too much to ask. Too much to give. Too much pain. And when is it all just too much to bear?
The fantasy is simple. Pleasure is good, and twice as much pleasure is better. That pain is bad, and no pain is better. But the reality is different. The reality is that pain is there to tell us something, and there's only so much pleasure we can take without getting a stomach ache. And maybe that's okay. Maybe some fantasies are only supposed to be lived in our dreams where too much is just too good.
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
A Clockwork Orange
I travel 25kms north and back south everyday. I take the company’s generously given transport service (Did someone say that there are no free lunches?). Considering my time of travel and also the traffic, I do spend a lot of time commuting. Along the way, unless one is sleepy, there are a lot of things people do to kill time. Talk. Sense or Non-Sense, they need to talk. Joke. Bad or Worse, they (the elderly!) need to. Gossip. Fiction or Insane, they need to spread the word. (This considering that there are none from the fairer sex aboard which prompted a friend to call our cab “The Fag Express”). Music. iPod or Music Phone. Rock or Bhajan. When you are listening to loud music on your earplugs, it’s interesting to see two people converse without trying to lip read. It’s infact fascinating to see the myriad expressions of the human face and how the intricate movement of each facial muscle conveys a different sentiment.
But when you are not doing any of the above, you look out and observe. Or You think about things that you would have probably never thought about.
There are two guys filling up water from a cracked pipeline. Some would squirm at the very thought of regular filtered water. There are people walking on the road. There are vehicles on the footpath. A guy carries a bag to office. He never wore a bag to college. Some god's special day. There is a long cavalcade. They have seated god in a chariot and taking him around the city. God was bored being confined to the temple. The traffic is thrown awry. People’s hallelujah isn’t loud enough. So they are using loud speakers. Off late god isn't able to hear people's whisper.
It’s Independence Day. The tri-color is all over the place. They are beaming with immense sense of patriotism. They are spitting on a “don't spit here” sign and throwing garbage all around the waste bin except into it. IITs and IIMs were established to nurture the best brains for the service of the country. They are singing the star sprangled banner. Some one comes and says that he is making an affordable car for the common man. Elitism starts parading. Half of them are suddenly worried about the environment and the other half about congestion. They would not dare care about a common man’s dream. 'A' breaks a traffic rule and 'B' stares at him badly. 'B' had broken one yesterday and is going to break one tomorrow. This is the land of the Kama sutra. People look south when someone even mentions the dreaded 3 letter word. A lady is haggling saying that she will give only Rs.4/kg. The vendor had asked for Rs.5/kg. The same lady goes and spends thousands on a fancy dinner. It’s mid-winter. The traveler isn't settling for a non-AC bus. A nation of a billion people. One gold medal. Human eye has blind spots. Brains are not compensating. The limited vision is protecting us.
And all the while I thought strange things happened only in fictional books.
But when you are not doing any of the above, you look out and observe. Or You think about things that you would have probably never thought about.
There are two guys filling up water from a cracked pipeline. Some would squirm at the very thought of regular filtered water. There are people walking on the road. There are vehicles on the footpath. A guy carries a bag to office. He never wore a bag to college. Some god's special day. There is a long cavalcade. They have seated god in a chariot and taking him around the city. God was bored being confined to the temple. The traffic is thrown awry. People’s hallelujah isn’t loud enough. So they are using loud speakers. Off late god isn't able to hear people's whisper.
It’s Independence Day. The tri-color is all over the place. They are beaming with immense sense of patriotism. They are spitting on a “don't spit here” sign and throwing garbage all around the waste bin except into it. IITs and IIMs were established to nurture the best brains for the service of the country. They are singing the star sprangled banner. Some one comes and says that he is making an affordable car for the common man. Elitism starts parading. Half of them are suddenly worried about the environment and the other half about congestion. They would not dare care about a common man’s dream. 'A' breaks a traffic rule and 'B' stares at him badly. 'B' had broken one yesterday and is going to break one tomorrow. This is the land of the Kama sutra. People look south when someone even mentions the dreaded 3 letter word. A lady is haggling saying that she will give only Rs.4/kg. The vendor had asked for Rs.5/kg. The same lady goes and spends thousands on a fancy dinner. It’s mid-winter. The traveler isn't settling for a non-AC bus. A nation of a billion people. One gold medal. Human eye has blind spots. Brains are not compensating. The limited vision is protecting us.
And all the while I thought strange things happened only in fictional books.
Monday, March 09, 2009
The Beauty And The Beast
A long time ago, there was this boy. And there was this girl. No! I'm not going to tell you a boy-meets-girl story. It’s slightly different. But they did meet.
The boy was a li'l too hotshot for the girl. She was the 'girl-next-door' types. They became friends. The girl started having feelings for him. She liked him. But the boy never noticed. He was too hung up with the girls in his "league".
She did a lot of stuff for him. When he would miss class, she would bring him the notes. When there was no seat in the auditorium, she would give up her own. When it would rain she would give up her umbrella by lying to the boy that she has another. When there were any classes cancelled, she would inform by giving a call.
Once when they had went on an excursion, the boy was reserving a seat besides him for a girl of his "league". When the girl (girl-next-door) saw that the boy was reserving a seat besides him, she mistook that it was for her and tries to sit. In a spontaneous reaction the boy shoves the girl aside saying that it’s not for her.
The girl was crestfallen. It looked like she would cry. She just walked away. She was never the same with him again. He had failed to "see" her.
The beauty had "killed" the beast.
A few years ago, there was this same boy again. And there was this other girl. As you would have guessed by the drift of the story, this time around the girl was li'l too hotshot for the boy.
They were pretty good friends. The boy liked her. But the girl didn't consider him to be in her "league". He did stuff for her. He helped her prepare her reports. When she would be in town for work, he would take her around. He would help her in procuring notes. He helped her in her studies. He even overlooked his close friends because they were not too "fanatical" about her. Most of all, he was not what he really was.
Once he was going to meet her after a long time. He dressed up well. Picked up flowers for her. On his way to meet her it started to rain. Undeterred, he rode in the rain just to see her for a few minutes from one end of the city to the other. He thought it would be all worth it. He saw her and ran towards her and closed her eyes from behind. She just did not react the way he wanted her to. She did not even ask how he was doing. Rather she went on asking for things that he could help her with. He was crushed. Even after all that years she just didn't "see" him the way he wanted her to.
Yet again, the beauty had "killed" the beast.
What went around had come around.
We all have been the "beauty" or the "beast" at one point or the other. It’s always tough for the beauty to accept the beast. But the point is beauty doesn't have to accept the beast. All it takes is a little appreciation, little gratitude and a little love to say that you care for all that has been done to you.
We live such complicated lives. Sometimes we fail to notice the small things. And sometimes we even fail to notice big things. Because not all wounds are superficial. Most wounds run deeper than we can imagine, you can’t see them with the naked eye and so sometimes they take us by surprise. But the trick with any kind of wound is to dig down and find the real source of the injury, and once you've found it, try like hell to heal it, try to keep the beast “alive”.
The boy was a li'l too hotshot for the girl. She was the 'girl-next-door' types. They became friends. The girl started having feelings for him. She liked him. But the boy never noticed. He was too hung up with the girls in his "league".
She did a lot of stuff for him. When he would miss class, she would bring him the notes. When there was no seat in the auditorium, she would give up her own. When it would rain she would give up her umbrella by lying to the boy that she has another. When there were any classes cancelled, she would inform by giving a call.
Once when they had went on an excursion, the boy was reserving a seat besides him for a girl of his "league". When the girl (girl-next-door) saw that the boy was reserving a seat besides him, she mistook that it was for her and tries to sit. In a spontaneous reaction the boy shoves the girl aside saying that it’s not for her.
The girl was crestfallen. It looked like she would cry. She just walked away. She was never the same with him again. He had failed to "see" her.
The beauty had "killed" the beast.
A few years ago, there was this same boy again. And there was this other girl. As you would have guessed by the drift of the story, this time around the girl was li'l too hotshot for the boy.
They were pretty good friends. The boy liked her. But the girl didn't consider him to be in her "league". He did stuff for her. He helped her prepare her reports. When she would be in town for work, he would take her around. He would help her in procuring notes. He helped her in her studies. He even overlooked his close friends because they were not too "fanatical" about her. Most of all, he was not what he really was.
Once he was going to meet her after a long time. He dressed up well. Picked up flowers for her. On his way to meet her it started to rain. Undeterred, he rode in the rain just to see her for a few minutes from one end of the city to the other. He thought it would be all worth it. He saw her and ran towards her and closed her eyes from behind. She just did not react the way he wanted her to. She did not even ask how he was doing. Rather she went on asking for things that he could help her with. He was crushed. Even after all that years she just didn't "see" him the way he wanted her to.
Yet again, the beauty had "killed" the beast.
What went around had come around.
We all have been the "beauty" or the "beast" at one point or the other. It’s always tough for the beauty to accept the beast. But the point is beauty doesn't have to accept the beast. All it takes is a little appreciation, little gratitude and a little love to say that you care for all that has been done to you.
We live such complicated lives. Sometimes we fail to notice the small things. And sometimes we even fail to notice big things. Because not all wounds are superficial. Most wounds run deeper than we can imagine, you can’t see them with the naked eye and so sometimes they take us by surprise. But the trick with any kind of wound is to dig down and find the real source of the injury, and once you've found it, try like hell to heal it, try to keep the beast “alive”.
Thursday, February 26, 2009
The 7th Capital Vice
Overturned the tuner and busted a radio. Smashed a TV screen. Broke a door. A stone was flighted and a skull was cracked. Broke a shuttle racquet and a bone while at it. Flunked a test. Smashed my spectacles. Kicked at a bi-cycle and broke its mud guard. Hammered a bike's petrol
tank and caused a dent. Used never before used words in a letter. Hit a face and got one back as a souvenir. Next time got one for free. “Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned", it seems.
The root cause of all the above is same. Anger.
Every-time my ears went red, I just crashed and burned. Anger is associated with a demon no less than the Satan himself. So you can fathom its destruction.
Growing up, we are taught that there are seven deadly sins. We all know the big ones... gluttony, pride, lust. But the thing you don't hear much about is anger. Maybe it's because we think anger is not that dangerous, that you can control it. We think its ok to be angry sometimes. We even think that it must have not even made the cut, when a list of the cardinal sins was made!
But the point is, maybe we don't give anger enough credit. As far as I’ve known of it, it can be a lot more dangerous than we think. After all when it comes to destructive behavior, it did make the top seven. Maybe as a venial sin, but it did make it. So what makes anger different from the six other deadly sins? It's pretty simple really, you give into a sin like envy or pride and you only hurt yourself. Try lust or coveting and you'll only hurt yourself and one or two others. But anger, anger is the worst... the mother of all sins... Not only can anger drive you over the edge, when it does, you can take an awful lot of people with you.
So clearly, Anger is underrated.
John Mirk asks men to "consider how angels flee before them and fiends run toward him to burn him with hellfire." Simply put, the next time you are at the breaking point, think what your action can cost. Or maybe think of Homer J Simpson, Like I do!
tank and caused a dent. Used never before used words in a letter. Hit a face and got one back as a souvenir. Next time got one for free. “Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned", it seems.
The root cause of all the above is same. Anger.
Every-time my ears went red, I just crashed and burned. Anger is associated with a demon no less than the Satan himself. So you can fathom its destruction.
Growing up, we are taught that there are seven deadly sins. We all know the big ones... gluttony, pride, lust. But the thing you don't hear much about is anger. Maybe it's because we think anger is not that dangerous, that you can control it. We think its ok to be angry sometimes. We even think that it must have not even made the cut, when a list of the cardinal sins was made!
But the point is, maybe we don't give anger enough credit. As far as I’ve known of it, it can be a lot more dangerous than we think. After all when it comes to destructive behavior, it did make the top seven. Maybe as a venial sin, but it did make it. So what makes anger different from the six other deadly sins? It's pretty simple really, you give into a sin like envy or pride and you only hurt yourself. Try lust or coveting and you'll only hurt yourself and one or two others. But anger, anger is the worst... the mother of all sins... Not only can anger drive you over the edge, when it does, you can take an awful lot of people with you.
So clearly, Anger is underrated.
John Mirk asks men to "consider how angels flee before them and fiends run toward him to burn him with hellfire." Simply put, the next time you are at the breaking point, think what your action can cost. Or maybe think of Homer J Simpson, Like I do!
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
If Tomorrow Never Comes
A couple of hundred years ago, Benjamin Franklin shared with the world the secret of his success. Never leave that till tomorrow, he said, which you can do today. This is the man who discovered electricity. You think more people would listen to what he had to say. Well, not really!
I for one, is guity of this. Ever since I got my senses going (not too long ago), I've been putting off doing things at the "right" time, only to regret later. There would be one or the other trivial excuse for it. Right from not enough ink in the pen to not the "appropriate" time.
I don't know why we put things off, but if I had to guess, I'd have to say it has a lot to do with fear. Fear of failure, fear of rejection, sometimes the fear is just of making a decision, because what if you're wrong? What if you're making a mistake you can't undo?
The early bird catches the worm. A stitch in time saves nine. He who hesitates is lost. We can't pretend we hadn't been told these. We've all heard the proverbs, heard the philosophers, heard our grandparents warning us about wasted time, heard the damn poets urging us to seize the day.
Having said that, still sometimes we have to see for ourselves. We have to make our own mistakes. We have to learn our own lessons. We have to sweep today's possibility under tomorrow's rug until we can't anymore. Until we finally understand for ourselves what Benjamin Franklin really meant. That knowing is better than wondering, that waking is better than sleeping, and even the biggest failure, even the worst, beat the hell out of never trying.
Friday, December 05, 2008
Midnight Philosophy
Her: I was reading your post. It's true right. God is within us. In all the good we think and feel, if not do. In retrospection, I have never thought badly about anyone or anything. Maybe I would have hurt so many by my own perception of good which in their perception would have looked bad.
It's also said that good people deserve good things. Take the case of your friend X. She is a good girl right, who used to take care of u, who is always been there for you, even you are there for her whenever she needs you. Then why is it that good people like her don’t get a good person. A million times I have felt that what I want for myself is right in front of me. But there are so many reasons stopping me from getting that. Again, is this what 'Our God' wants for us? Coz if we believed it totally that everything was in our hands, then I could have got what I wanted without having to think about my fate not wanting it, without having to become one more X, who will call you in the middle of the night and crib about her life.
Him: As I understand it, Life is not perfect. We strive for perfections with all our imperfections. Good people deserve good things has always been very esoteric to me.
You might know the kind of person u want is right in front of you. You maybe right u maybe wrong. It’s not the end of all to have a good life.
According to me, in such cases, if its meant to be and want it as badly as the other person, it will come around. Otherwise its just not meant to be, this is what I tell myself at least. If only everything turned out as we expected it to be, it wouldn't be Life. It would be very mundane.
Two people can be very good friends but they can't necessarily be a good couple. I feel.so, I'm not saying it can never happen. There is no guarantee that one way or the other it would be beautiful or misery.
Be happy. Take things as they come. Don't compare. Everyone has his own beauty. Explore it. And you will have a good life. But I do hope you would call me. Not midnight though.
Her: Why does it happen that when fate comes to you, you reject it? And when you want it, fate rejects you?
Him: I'm not a big philosopher or an 80 yr old' to answer this convincingly. But from whatever li'l I understand…
The system is designed in such a way that when something comes there is no sign that he/she/it is the one. We might think that it is the one and cling to it or put it aside n move on. That's the beauty of life, if we knew everything from the back of the hand, the purpose would be lost.
You are never on your own. You are dictated by situations, bound by commitments, or in some case u just don't see it. So you really can't blame yourself for looking the other way.
Learn to smile at these things. Don't worry what you lost. Look at what you gained.
I hope I made some sense.
It's also said that good people deserve good things. Take the case of your friend X. She is a good girl right, who used to take care of u, who is always been there for you, even you are there for her whenever she needs you. Then why is it that good people like her don’t get a good person. A million times I have felt that what I want for myself is right in front of me. But there are so many reasons stopping me from getting that. Again, is this what 'Our God' wants for us? Coz if we believed it totally that everything was in our hands, then I could have got what I wanted without having to think about my fate not wanting it, without having to become one more X, who will call you in the middle of the night and crib about her life.
Him: As I understand it, Life is not perfect. We strive for perfections with all our imperfections. Good people deserve good things has always been very esoteric to me.
You might know the kind of person u want is right in front of you. You maybe right u maybe wrong. It’s not the end of all to have a good life.
According to me, in such cases, if its meant to be and want it as badly as the other person, it will come around. Otherwise its just not meant to be, this is what I tell myself at least. If only everything turned out as we expected it to be, it wouldn't be Life. It would be very mundane.
Two people can be very good friends but they can't necessarily be a good couple. I feel.so, I'm not saying it can never happen. There is no guarantee that one way or the other it would be beautiful or misery.
Be happy. Take things as they come. Don't compare. Everyone has his own beauty. Explore it. And you will have a good life. But I do hope you would call me. Not midnight though.
Her: Why does it happen that when fate comes to you, you reject it? And when you want it, fate rejects you?
Him: I'm not a big philosopher or an 80 yr old' to answer this convincingly. But from whatever li'l I understand…
The system is designed in such a way that when something comes there is no sign that he/she/it is the one. We might think that it is the one and cling to it or put it aside n move on. That's the beauty of life, if we knew everything from the back of the hand, the purpose would be lost.
You are never on your own. You are dictated by situations, bound by commitments, or in some case u just don't see it. So you really can't blame yourself for looking the other way.
Learn to smile at these things. Don't worry what you lost. Look at what you gained.
I hope I made some sense.
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Old Joy
One of the ways of idling away a wintery night is to sink under a quilt, look out into the dark and reminisce the past. The childhood.
Then what actually sets in is a sense of what the romantics called the Sublime: getting lost in the years of wonder, a surrender of the self.
Quite strangely the thoughts "wander" chronologically. It starts with the times of playing cricket on the road, breaking the neighbor’s window panes. Running out in the middle of the game to watch Mithun da's action flick on doordarshan. The sheer joy of watching Tales Pin and Duck Tales on sunday mornings. Getting up at 3AM to watch cricket matches. Running back home breathlessly after school to watch the dying moments of a cricket match.
Waiting for dad to come home on a Friday evening with the new edition of the sportstar. It was actually the center-fold poster that aroused the curiosity. Reading all those Tinkles and Tintins. The rides on dad's scooter. The excitement of going out to eat Masala Dosa. Buying 10 shunti peppermints with 50 paisa on the way to the school.
Renting a VCP for a day and try squeezing in as many movies as possible. Two Raj Kumar movies for the old. Two Van Damme movies for the young. Watching Jackie Chan movies for 10 rupees at a nearby theatre.
Matching the color of the eraser, pencil, scale and other paraphernalia with that of the cute girl who sat next to you in the classroom. Fixing the class quizzes so that you look like a real smart ass to the cute girl.
Making the 5 fold paper planes with the math notes at the end of the academic year. Stripping the notebooks off their hardbound and constructing houses with them. Eventually bringing down the house by "directing" an action sequence where the hot wheel scar swirls out of control and smashes into the house.
Waiting for mom and dad to go out for groceries so that we can loot the eatables and conduct our cricket "world cup" played with the rolled up paper ball and the pencil case which served as a bat. We made sure India won most of the world cups.
Hitting a tire around. Playing cop and thief with the tires. Flaunting the bicycle. Taking it for a walk. Cycling to school. Cycling back home in record time. Watering the plants. Letting a paper boat sail in the drains and running behind it.
Working on projects like designing a missile launcher with a wood plank and 3 nails. Launching the missiles into the neighbor's garden. Testing the range of those. Redesigning to achieve a longer range.
Sending postcards with questions to 'Tinkle Tells You Why'. Waiting for the trinn of the postman's bicycle hoping that he would bring news of us winning some prizes.
Hanging out with your best friend and discussing the adventures of superman. Wondering whether there is superman's dress available in the market which would make us super. Trying to do a Tarzan and breaking my left arm, while the best friend runs away from there.
And it doesn’t end at this.
15 years since the last memory of the innocent past. Things have gone topsy-turvy. There is no more beauty in minimalistic things. Wants have become very materialistic.
There is a kind of inherent queasiness to revisiting a dormant friendship. You try to rekindle the bond but eventually it becomes clear that time elapsed is not the only roadblock standing between estranged friends.
The old joy is all the blissful joy there ever was.
Then what actually sets in is a sense of what the romantics called the Sublime: getting lost in the years of wonder, a surrender of the self.
Quite strangely the thoughts "wander" chronologically. It starts with the times of playing cricket on the road, breaking the neighbor’s window panes. Running out in the middle of the game to watch Mithun da's action flick on doordarshan. The sheer joy of watching Tales Pin and Duck Tales on sunday mornings. Getting up at 3AM to watch cricket matches. Running back home breathlessly after school to watch the dying moments of a cricket match.
Waiting for dad to come home on a Friday evening with the new edition of the sportstar. It was actually the center-fold poster that aroused the curiosity. Reading all those Tinkles and Tintins. The rides on dad's scooter. The excitement of going out to eat Masala Dosa. Buying 10 shunti peppermints with 50 paisa on the way to the school.
Renting a VCP for a day and try squeezing in as many movies as possible. Two Raj Kumar movies for the old. Two Van Damme movies for the young. Watching Jackie Chan movies for 10 rupees at a nearby theatre.
Matching the color of the eraser, pencil, scale and other paraphernalia with that of the cute girl who sat next to you in the classroom. Fixing the class quizzes so that you look like a real smart ass to the cute girl.
Making the 5 fold paper planes with the math notes at the end of the academic year. Stripping the notebooks off their hardbound and constructing houses with them. Eventually bringing down the house by "directing" an action sequence where the hot wheel scar swirls out of control and smashes into the house.
Waiting for mom and dad to go out for groceries so that we can loot the eatables and conduct our cricket "world cup" played with the rolled up paper ball and the pencil case which served as a bat. We made sure India won most of the world cups.
Hitting a tire around. Playing cop and thief with the tires. Flaunting the bicycle. Taking it for a walk. Cycling to school. Cycling back home in record time. Watering the plants. Letting a paper boat sail in the drains and running behind it.
Working on projects like designing a missile launcher with a wood plank and 3 nails. Launching the missiles into the neighbor's garden. Testing the range of those. Redesigning to achieve a longer range.
Sending postcards with questions to 'Tinkle Tells You Why'. Waiting for the trinn of the postman's bicycle hoping that he would bring news of us winning some prizes.
Hanging out with your best friend and discussing the adventures of superman. Wondering whether there is superman's dress available in the market which would make us super. Trying to do a Tarzan and breaking my left arm, while the best friend runs away from there.
And it doesn’t end at this.
15 years since the last memory of the innocent past. Things have gone topsy-turvy. There is no more beauty in minimalistic things. Wants have become very materialistic.
There is a kind of inherent queasiness to revisiting a dormant friendship. You try to rekindle the bond but eventually it becomes clear that time elapsed is not the only roadblock standing between estranged friends.
The old joy is all the blissful joy there ever was.
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Quarter-life Crisis
The other day, one of my friends turned a year older into the later half of the 20s. I happily welcomed into the club and we discussed how life would get into muck from here on.
As a follow-up, a couple of days later he sent a forward which pretty much echoed the travails of being over the hill. (I feel over 25 is over the hill!)
You look at your job... and it is not even close to what you thought you would be doing, or maybe you are looking for a job and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and that scares you. Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and are constantly adding things to your list of what is acceptable and what isn't. One minute, you are insecure and then the next, secure.
You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life. You feel alone and scared and confused. Suddenly, change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life, but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away, and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward.
You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you. Or you lie in bed and wonder why you can't meet anyone decent enough that you want to get to know better. Or maybe you love someone but love someone else too and cannot figure out why you're doing this because you know that you aren't a bad person. You want to settle down for good because now all of a sudden that becomes top priority. Getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic. You begin to think a companion for life is better than a hundred in the shack and for once you would not mind standing tall for that special someone which otherwise you had never thought of until now. You go through the same emotions and questions over and over, and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision. You worry about loans, money, the future and making a life for yourself... and while winning the race would be great, right now you'd just like to be a contender!
What you may not realize is that every one reading this relates to it.We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out.
We call it the "Quarter-life Crisis".
P.S. I hope there wouldn't be a sequel to this, the Mid-life Crisis !
As a follow-up, a couple of days later he sent a forward which pretty much echoed the travails of being over the hill. (I feel over 25 is over the hill!)
You look at your job... and it is not even close to what you thought you would be doing, or maybe you are looking for a job and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and that scares you. Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and are constantly adding things to your list of what is acceptable and what isn't. One minute, you are insecure and then the next, secure.
You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life. You feel alone and scared and confused. Suddenly, change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life, but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away, and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward.
You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you. Or you lie in bed and wonder why you can't meet anyone decent enough that you want to get to know better. Or maybe you love someone but love someone else too and cannot figure out why you're doing this because you know that you aren't a bad person. You want to settle down for good because now all of a sudden that becomes top priority. Getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic. You begin to think a companion for life is better than a hundred in the shack and for once you would not mind standing tall for that special someone which otherwise you had never thought of until now. You go through the same emotions and questions over and over, and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision. You worry about loans, money, the future and making a life for yourself... and while winning the race would be great, right now you'd just like to be a contender!
What you may not realize is that every one reading this relates to it.We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out.
We call it the "Quarter-life Crisis".
P.S. I hope there wouldn't be a sequel to this, the Mid-life Crisis !
Monday, July 14, 2008
Lesson of Life
Learning is an imperative part of life. And it never ceases. You learn about friendship, love and sometimes about life in general. You learn from various avenues. Sometimes from friends, parents and sometimes from yourself and sometimes even from absolute strangers.
I once learnt something about relationships from a stranger in a very subtle, implicit way. Cut to a few years, when I was still in college, one of close friend's b'day was due. So I went to a gift shop along with a few other friends to get a present. We chose something and handed over the gift to the shopkeeper to wrap it. The lady shopkeeper came over to us with a few wrapping papers asking us to choose one. The friends that had come along were looking at the covers and deliberating which one to choose. Looking at their confused faces, I told them "just choose some paper; it’s just for S anyways". The lady shopkeeper who heard this quipped "That's the mistake we often make" with a soft smile on her face. I looked at her blankly and went out. I didn't read much into it as it didn't make much sense to me then.
Later, I realized the meaning in the words of that lady. We often take people who are very close to us for granted thinking that they would understand. We fail to express our feelings thinking that they know how we feel about them. We fail to appreciate their good gestures to us thinking that it is expected from them.
That's the mistake we all often make. It’s very important to express our feelings with our close ones from time to time and at any given opportunity, because sometimes it’s just too late and we end up losing them.
As Jack Nicholson says in the movie, 'About Schmidt': Learn to appreciate what you have while you still have it.
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